Here are some suggestions for presents. Some are your obvious, buy on the internet, nice gifts, and some are ones that you might not have known about if it weren't for your unfiltered friend, Big Mama Taylor.
1. Monogrammed C. Wonder Tote
I saw a quote once and it said "If it ain't monogrammed you don't own it." Quite frankly if monogramming were free I would monogram EVERYTHING under the sun. There aren't many options to dress boys cute past smocking, which I have learned doesn't last too long after two, so I monogrammed a lot of Brooks' clothes until I got pregnant with the second and realized none of those precious items would get passed down. Sorry, second kid, you are monogrammed a lot less.
I love monogrammed stuff and it's really catching on in the trends and now pretty major retailers have lots of cute regular every day stuff you can monogram, like this cute tote from C. Wonder. It's perfect for running errands and to the gym. It's the perfect size to lose all my stuff and somehow after a week hold everything from a plastic lizard to my car keys to a dirty diaper.
2. Time with her girlfriends
Consider setting up a girls night out for your beautiful wife. Sure we have them on our own once-in-a-blue-moon, but we feel incredibly guilty, and by the time we have figured out plans for child care, made sure everyone is fed, bathed and happy, gotten dressed in real live clothes, and put on 3 swipes of make up, quite frankly we are so tired we are thinking we might as well take a bath and go to bed. So text her best gals and set it up for her
The thing that happens when we don't get out with our girls is we start to lose our social skills. Answering crazy toddler questions and telling our one year old to stop eating ants does not count as "talking." Our brain literally fries during the day and when we are allowed to get out of the house, especially stress free, this magical thing happens where we get so happy we might even come home and make out with you. This fabulous Latin lady I see every single day at the YMCA leaned in to kiss me on the cheek and I was so flustered I ended up kissing her on the lips. Yes folks, a full on kiss on the lips. This was almost 2 years ago and I am still not recovered. What happened was I moved to Florida and didn't go out for so long that I was flustered altogether by human interaction. We had started to become friendly and say hi to each other and I had noticed that she and all her fabulous latin friends would hug and be affectionate with each other. I don't know if it was the lack of friends or me missing Texas but I wanted in on their huggy circle. So one day she calls me over to the wolf pack of them lifting with each other (turns out she wanted to ask me if I was pregnant, I was 10 weeks and looked about 32 weeks along). When I get over there she leans over to put her weights down, and I thought she was going for the side kiss like she did with all her gal pals. Nope, she wasn't, and I somehow ended up kissing her side mouth. Let's just say I was never invited into that wolf pack. Moral of the story: Plan your wife a girls night so she doesn't accidentally side mouth kiss people at the YMCA.
3. Letter Necklace
The only thing better than monogramming stuff with our own initials is wearing our people's monogram. This is a great gift if you have kids, or you're newly married, in my opinion. If you're newly married getting the letter of her new last name is fun. If you have kids, get their initials and she can combine them on one necklace. Jewels always wins.
Listen, we love you, dear husband, but we don't get the alone time you get. Every time you're on the potty alone, I want you to think of us, and how we can't even say restroom anymore, just potty. It's like it's embroiled on my brain. I could be talking to David Beckham and I would say potty. I can't not say potty. Anywho, think of us, when you're alone, and know that we are never, ever alone, not even on the potty. I cannot even tinkle without Brooks asking me if I have a "really bad rash?" He had a rash one time, like 2 years ago, and for some reason he now thinks I have a really bad rash. Every day. So you know what a good gift is? Coming home, and giving us really cute pajama pants, and shoving us into the bedroom with a bag of dove chocolates, a hot bath, and something horribly trashy to watch on tv. Give us a date with our sanity. Below are some cute pajama pants that I wouldn't mind being gifted, as long as they came with said alone time, chocolates, bath and good recorded shows.
Side Note: If you are reading, and you are rich, well first of all, give me some money. But seriously, if you have the money, in addition to alone time, send your gal pal to a spa. There is literally nothing better than someone doing something so ridiculously spoiled and luxurious as sitting in a robe and getting pampered. I personally need a completely new eyebrow shape and have since 2001 but I just haven't had the chance to conquer this beast. And yes, stuff like that really stresses me out.
5. This Mug. Also go ahead and get wine. Lots of wine. A mom is like a fine automobile and a fine automobile runs on coffee, and wine.
6. Weekend Travel Bag
Again, monogram the crud out of anything you get for your girl. She will probably want to divorce you a lot less when you mess up because she has so much monogrammed cute stuff. Winning! This is a great little weekend travel bag that should never be filled with diapers, wipes and hand sanitizer. It should only be filled with fedoras, swimsuits and boxed wine, the classy stuff that weekend getaways are made of. Link and picture below.
In summary, get your mom, mother-in-law, and mom of your kids a gift. Heck, you might want to get any mom you know a gift. Be sure to just walk around that day saying to any woman you see "you are a blessing and so are your ovaries." And remember, this is the reaction you will get for kisses if you do not give this lady something monogrammed or alone for Mother's Day. You heard it here first.
