In our lives it seems like there are times when major life events are bunched together. A few years after college there is a period when everyone gets married and any bonuses from work are spent flying to all your friends weddings. I am currently watching a lot of my friends have their first baby, and it is so much fun to see these people that I love go through the very best, most exciting time of their lives. It seems like I have had kids forever. I don't remember the time of my life when I didn't, it seems. And my Brooks just turned 3! But I do remember the feeling, amazing, like it was yesterday, when I laid eyes on my first baby. And I wish I had taken the time to write a letter to this soul before he was even out. I would love to read a whole letter of my feelings at that time, for all the excitement and fear and expectations. And for all the little souls that God is going to send me. I wrote in a baby book for both of my kids, but it was different. I could write 10 books to each of them now about how I feel now, and in case we have any more, I wanted to get it on paper (internet...) now, how I feel to be your mama. This is for you, Brooks and Luke. And any future babies, if there are any more for me (I hope there are, Lord!)
Dear Baby,
I am so excited to meet you. You just have no idea! I daydream all day about what you will look like. You are just a little organism and already the thought of anything happening to you makes my heart ache. What if you are not cute? What if you are cuter than my wildest fantasies? What if you get my nose? I'm sorry about that. I'm sorry I don't enjoy being pregnant, but I know it will be worth it. Sorry that I take you for runs even though my belly is getting big. I need these endorphins so I can make it through the day. You will learn your mama is a little crazy but I am a better mama when I get to run. I feel like when we go for these runs our adventures are starting. I hope that warm fuzzy feeling I get at mile 3, you get too. I hope you like caramel on your ice cream too, and I'm sorry about all the spicy food!
I worry so much. I worry if you are a boy you will come out without a penis, is that a thing? Or if you are a girl, that you might look like I did when I was in the 8th grade playing softball. Bad phase. I just think of anything and everything that could ever happen, and then I research crazy things that will never happen. I worry that I will do the right things. I worry that I will hold you too much. I worry I won't hold you enough. I worry that I like wine a lot, and now I have you to take care of, will there be any more time for wine? I have so many faults and I never want you to know about a single one of them. When you come I will be different, I hope. I will be better. I won't ever have that last glass of wine I shouldn't have, and I'll go to bed when that voice in my head says to, because I want to run with you tomorrow. I won't tell any more fibs and I won't gossip any more because I want you to have a good example. I promise I will try to be the best example to you that I can. But I am sure I will screw up and boy does that scare me. How can I be doing this? How can I be responsible for another human being?
I lay awake at night and wonder what it will feel like. I have seen it in movies and replayed the moment in my head a million times. But I still have no idea what it will feel like when they hand you to me. I hope I don't look too terribly awful during labor because your daddy will be in the room, and boy do I love him! I want you to know that. I love your daddy more than anything in the whole world. I love the way my head fits on his shoulder perfectly. I love the way that God planned my life and the way I met him and the way I stalked him until he asked me out. He is so strong, yet he is gentle and kind. He is so wonderful, and I don't really deserve him, but I am trying so hard to be a good wife! We are so in love and you were sooo wanted, sweet baby. I hope that when you come, I feel overjoyed and confident and wonderful. I dream about the moment our eyes meet and we know we will be ok. I hope I don't feel scared and overwhelmed. Maybe I will feel all of those things. If I do I know your daddy will make me feel better, and even if I look like a train wreck after you come out, I know he will hug me tight and tell me I look beautiful, and he will mean it.
Well, now you are here. Oh, sweet baby, you are so special to me. Motherhood is beyond my wildest expectations. I finally understand why it's really just not explainable. You have to live it and breathe in your baby to finally understand why you don't even remember life before you came. Sometimes you drive me flat out bonkers but then my nightfall, you are asleep, and suddenly, I miss you so much I want to wake you up for one more hug. I even, for a crazy second, consider it! So I trudge to my bedroom and go to sleep, and I can't wait to see you in the morning, your fat fingers, curled around the crib railing, waiting for me to scoop you up.
You're growing up, baby. You're talking to me and counting numbers and learning colors and telling me you love my macaroni. I love the feeling when you hug me back. Your tiny hands and fingers curl around my shoulders and suddenly, you feel like a big boy and I wonder if I missed a moment when you were a baby. I feel like I might actually be doing something right and not screwing you up. I feel like the world is ours to have, like we can just skip around and play all day and if something ever happened to you baby I really don't know what I would do.
And then some days it seems like I might not make it. I count the minutes until the YMCA opens and I can drop you off to run on the treadmill, melting my stress away. Then I stand at the 2-way glass window and watch you play. I watch you and your brother walk off and be big boys, and be ok without me, for a minute. And I feel absolutely awful for ever wanting a break in the first place. The younger of you babies swallowed a nickel and when I fished it out I felt like I couldn't go on. You crazy boys are busy and some days I feel like I can't keep up, and I tell your daddy we will have to be ok with just our little family because I want to be a really, really good mom and I worry I can't handle you crazy little boys. I am doing my best and if I have to load the dishwasher one more time I might just curl into a ball on the floor and not get up. But then you smile at me. Your eyes twinkle and I melt. You say in the sweetest, softest voice, a voice I feel like I have known for 50 years "Mama, be happy." You always say this to me because you love it when I'm happy. It means you're allowed to be happy, and we are going to have a great day. And I know I'm a good mama. And you are a really, really good baby.
Thank you, thank you my loves. We are in this together and I am so proud of the boys you are becoming. We have so many good memories to come. And for the first time in my life, I don't feel like "I can't wait for them." I want them to slow down, to 15 miles per hour, annoying school zone speed. I want to watch them on slow motion, and soak up every moment, every hug, every giggle. You are everything I ever dreamed of motherhood to be, and so much more. You are my everything.
All my love
Momma
Big Mama Taylor Blog
Tuesday, December 10, 2013
Friday, November 15, 2013
Your kid isn't special
OK I know that title is a bit harsh. I probably should NOT blog when I'm in this sassy of a mood, but, here we go anyway. I am really frustrated with all the hype over our children. Yours, mine, the ones that just had a full conversation in sign language at the park, heck I'm even frustrated with George. Yes, Prince George. I went there!
Again, I want to blame social media, but it's really just a starting point for the mania that we currently face as parents: everyone is bragging about their kids, and let's be honest - we are really lucky they didn't eat that booger in front of the teacher today and waited until they got in the car.
You see, even though someone is going to grow up to be the President, and another will grow up to be a Professor, and yet another will grow up to be the doctor that saves someone's life, when they are 2, they really are just a sweet, learning soul. And I really don't need to hear about your little angel who is learning mandarin every night before bed, because mostly, it makes me feel terrible that Brooks and I end each night by making up songs about all the things we have seen every day.
My son greeted me this morning by proclaiming, very proudly, that he "had a huge booger." By the time we are 30, we have learned that this is private information. Good gracious, you say to yourself upon waking up, what is that a shoe in my nose? And you scurry into the bathroom and take care of that booger. But at two years old, my Brooks lacks what you might call a "filter." If I'm using the restroom, even peeing, he will come ask me if I'm having a "really bad poop." I have no idea where he got this one. Just lately if I take more than 2.4 seconds to use the restroom, he asks me if I'm "getting a really bad rash." Everything in the potty arena is "really bad." There are no normal poops or rashes or tinkles. Everything is a really big tinkle, a very huge poop, or a really terrible rash. The point on this is that kids say hilarious things, and I revel in some of our public funny moments. Recently he asked a beautiful little Hispanic girl at the doctor's office if she was Dora. Last week he was convinced a very tall athletic man at the YMCA was a "Miami Dolphin." On the airplane coming back from Green Bay, Wisconsin, he zeroed in on a very large man with a beard and kept yelling, extremely loudly, "there goes that fluffy man again!" And the list goes on. They are exploring and learning social boundaries and it's hilarious and fun to watch. And most of the time, I'm really not embarrassed at what he says because it's harmless and he's learning.
Here's what I have a problem with....
1. All Natural Mom
Praise Jesus, I grew up on bologna and mayonnaise sandwiches, pop tarts (brown sugar kind only), and cheese melted in a glass (that's for another blog, and yes, I was an overweight child in junior high), and I'm just fine. In fact, I attempt to eat really healthy and think I am actually pretty balanced and normal. The point is, if your kid likes only yogurt and bran cereal for 3 months, he's going to be fine. And reading about that lady named Harmony who claims that her kid eats only fermented vegetables in the morning is just going to make you crazy, so either unfriend her, or know she's probably lying and she's alternating fermented vegetables with skittles as bribes. I can't be the only one....
2. My kid is gonna be President mom
I overheard an entire conversation at the grocery check out line about a lady who was very proud of her son, who was clearly growing to be a leader in the classroom, the sports field, and even the playground. Over time it had become clear to this mom that he had really begun to step out into the world as a student that could be seen leading by example. I thought, oh that's so lovely. Until I heard her say he had gotten the FIRST GRADE star student of the week. Holy. Moses. Lady. Slow. Down. I am so very proud of your little guy for the star of the week business, but the extra pressures we put on our kids at such a young age is so alarming it actually makes me a little sad. Whatever happened to being pleased with the fact that they are just going to school and having a great day? It's not enough anymore to just be bright, now they must be a leader, in 9 clubs and in 13 after school activities. Now, I have an almost 3 year old and a 1 year old, so I am not in that arena yet, but I really hope that when I get there, I'm praising things like getting through the day and not picking boogers till we get in the car, and letting them develop as they will naturally.
3. My kid is gonna be 7 feet tall mom
I am so over the chic who casually says that her little Johnny is suddenly so tall and is going to probably be 6 feet 5 inches and the NFL's best receiver in around 20 years. Of course, we all revel in our children's growth and I'm right there with you. There's something very rewarding and fulfilling about feeling like you are nourishing them and they are physically growing and happy children. But really at the end of the day I don't know if my kid is going to be 5'4" or 6'2" and I'm pretty positive I won't know until he's 19, so I'll worry about that day when it comes.
4. My kid never misbehaves mom
Honey please. Every child has their days! And adults have their days too! Just yesterday I was feeling extra spicy and misbehaved twice. Our entire life is really about facing every day and attempting to stay within whatever social parameters that are appropriate for our age and time in our life. And sometimes, there are just bad days. There are a lot of days that I'm downright desperate for a new way to discipline. I have tried it all -
Lovey Mom "Sweetheart, you have a beautiful soul and I love you more than anything in the world, but it's not ok to draw in red marker all over the wall of the house we are renting and can't find the paint for the wall."
Meany Mom "Brooks, if you don't stop kicking your crib and go to rest, so help me God I'm going to come in there and spank your bottom and not on your diaper!"
Ignorey Mom "La di da, la di da, I do not see you spitting out your food on purpose..."
Funny Mom (Saying this in a singing voice while also doing a jig) "Oh, little Brooks, we don't throw rocks at our neighbors car!"
Some days I have to be funny mom and some days I have to be meany mom. And yes, I really do spank, judge away, sometimes, that is what works for my Brooks and I.
I guess my point on this isn't really that your kid isn't special, because of course he or she is extremely special. I know God picked out my little spitfire Brooks and my little ball of macaroni Luke just for me, because he knew I had the ability to raise these children. But that doesn't mean that every day isn't a straight struggle. I worry every. single. day. that I am screwing them up or doing something that will hinder them and not give them the very best opportunity to be succesful. I guess all we can do is love them.....hug them as often as they will let me.....and hope they aren't mad I didn't take the time to teach them mandarin.
Again, I want to blame social media, but it's really just a starting point for the mania that we currently face as parents: everyone is bragging about their kids, and let's be honest - we are really lucky they didn't eat that booger in front of the teacher today and waited until they got in the car.
You see, even though someone is going to grow up to be the President, and another will grow up to be a Professor, and yet another will grow up to be the doctor that saves someone's life, when they are 2, they really are just a sweet, learning soul. And I really don't need to hear about your little angel who is learning mandarin every night before bed, because mostly, it makes me feel terrible that Brooks and I end each night by making up songs about all the things we have seen every day.
My son greeted me this morning by proclaiming, very proudly, that he "had a huge booger." By the time we are 30, we have learned that this is private information. Good gracious, you say to yourself upon waking up, what is that a shoe in my nose? And you scurry into the bathroom and take care of that booger. But at two years old, my Brooks lacks what you might call a "filter." If I'm using the restroom, even peeing, he will come ask me if I'm having a "really bad poop." I have no idea where he got this one. Just lately if I take more than 2.4 seconds to use the restroom, he asks me if I'm "getting a really bad rash." Everything in the potty arena is "really bad." There are no normal poops or rashes or tinkles. Everything is a really big tinkle, a very huge poop, or a really terrible rash. The point on this is that kids say hilarious things, and I revel in some of our public funny moments. Recently he asked a beautiful little Hispanic girl at the doctor's office if she was Dora. Last week he was convinced a very tall athletic man at the YMCA was a "Miami Dolphin." On the airplane coming back from Green Bay, Wisconsin, he zeroed in on a very large man with a beard and kept yelling, extremely loudly, "there goes that fluffy man again!" And the list goes on. They are exploring and learning social boundaries and it's hilarious and fun to watch. And most of the time, I'm really not embarrassed at what he says because it's harmless and he's learning.
Here's what I have a problem with....
1. All Natural Mom
Praise Jesus, I grew up on bologna and mayonnaise sandwiches, pop tarts (brown sugar kind only), and cheese melted in a glass (that's for another blog, and yes, I was an overweight child in junior high), and I'm just fine. In fact, I attempt to eat really healthy and think I am actually pretty balanced and normal. The point is, if your kid likes only yogurt and bran cereal for 3 months, he's going to be fine. And reading about that lady named Harmony who claims that her kid eats only fermented vegetables in the morning is just going to make you crazy, so either unfriend her, or know she's probably lying and she's alternating fermented vegetables with skittles as bribes. I can't be the only one....
2. My kid is gonna be President mom
I overheard an entire conversation at the grocery check out line about a lady who was very proud of her son, who was clearly growing to be a leader in the classroom, the sports field, and even the playground. Over time it had become clear to this mom that he had really begun to step out into the world as a student that could be seen leading by example. I thought, oh that's so lovely. Until I heard her say he had gotten the FIRST GRADE star student of the week. Holy. Moses. Lady. Slow. Down. I am so very proud of your little guy for the star of the week business, but the extra pressures we put on our kids at such a young age is so alarming it actually makes me a little sad. Whatever happened to being pleased with the fact that they are just going to school and having a great day? It's not enough anymore to just be bright, now they must be a leader, in 9 clubs and in 13 after school activities. Now, I have an almost 3 year old and a 1 year old, so I am not in that arena yet, but I really hope that when I get there, I'm praising things like getting through the day and not picking boogers till we get in the car, and letting them develop as they will naturally.
3. My kid is gonna be 7 feet tall mom
I am so over the chic who casually says that her little Johnny is suddenly so tall and is going to probably be 6 feet 5 inches and the NFL's best receiver in around 20 years. Of course, we all revel in our children's growth and I'm right there with you. There's something very rewarding and fulfilling about feeling like you are nourishing them and they are physically growing and happy children. But really at the end of the day I don't know if my kid is going to be 5'4" or 6'2" and I'm pretty positive I won't know until he's 19, so I'll worry about that day when it comes.
4. My kid never misbehaves mom
Honey please. Every child has their days! And adults have their days too! Just yesterday I was feeling extra spicy and misbehaved twice. Our entire life is really about facing every day and attempting to stay within whatever social parameters that are appropriate for our age and time in our life. And sometimes, there are just bad days. There are a lot of days that I'm downright desperate for a new way to discipline. I have tried it all -
Lovey Mom "Sweetheart, you have a beautiful soul and I love you more than anything in the world, but it's not ok to draw in red marker all over the wall of the house we are renting and can't find the paint for the wall."
Meany Mom "Brooks, if you don't stop kicking your crib and go to rest, so help me God I'm going to come in there and spank your bottom and not on your diaper!"
Ignorey Mom "La di da, la di da, I do not see you spitting out your food on purpose..."
Funny Mom (Saying this in a singing voice while also doing a jig) "Oh, little Brooks, we don't throw rocks at our neighbors car!"
Some days I have to be funny mom and some days I have to be meany mom. And yes, I really do spank, judge away, sometimes, that is what works for my Brooks and I.
I guess my point on this isn't really that your kid isn't special, because of course he or she is extremely special. I know God picked out my little spitfire Brooks and my little ball of macaroni Luke just for me, because he knew I had the ability to raise these children. But that doesn't mean that every day isn't a straight struggle. I worry every. single. day. that I am screwing them up or doing something that will hinder them and not give them the very best opportunity to be succesful. I guess all we can do is love them.....hug them as often as they will let me.....and hope they aren't mad I didn't take the time to teach them mandarin.
Saturday, September 14, 2013
For the Love of the Game
I have often thought of doing a post on what it's like to grow up in this crazy life of football....the only thing that has kept me hesitant from writing about my experiences is that I don't know where to begin, or where it would ever end. I feel like I have been so engrossed in this crazy life in so many different ways that I could write a novel on the experiences I have had, if anyone would ever read it (snoooooze).
In the past few months there have been a lot of articles about a certain football player named Johnny Manziel, the quarterback at Texas A&M. He has at times done things to bring attention to himself in a negative manner in the past few months. Because he won the Heisman Trophy after his unbelievable freshman year, he was thrust into the limelight, and what happened is what would probably happen for about 95% of all regular college guys - he made mistakes, and the world got to watch, and judge. He just didn't have the luxury to go through this new fish bowl life without facebook, ESPN stories, and twitter. I am not going to write an "I feel sorry for Johnny Manziel" article, mostly because I think my husband would kill me for writing a blog on him at all. I honestly don't know what you will think about this blog Zac, but I hope you will understand that I need to write it.
Most of my blogs have a purpose, all selfish. I recently wrote about my beautiful sister Kathryn who has down syndrome, and the lessons she has taught me. I want to think of Kathryn and smile and remember those things that she has taught me. I don't really know what the purpose of this blog is except to be therapy for me. So here I go. I am going to write a little ditty about what I think that about the current game of football, and maybe what we can all learn from it.
With the start of the NFL regular season last weekend I am brought back. I feel the all too familiar knots in my stomach and I will spend every Sunday (or in this season's case, 2 Mondays and a Thursday night too) feeling like I will puke at any second watching what is just a game, but for my family, so much more.
I have never known what it is like to watch football as a fan. I truly cannot imagine showing up to a football game and just enjoying it, stress free. I have watched this crazy game as a daughter who loves her dad more than anything in the world. And I have watched my dad endure both some of the coolest moments and hardest disappointments. I have watched as a girlfriend crazily in love with the man on the field getting sacked. I have stood next to him while he gets told by a trainer after the game to not go to sleep for a few hours because he has endured a concussion. And now, I watch as a loving wife of a coach knowing my family is depending on my husband's paycheck and job.
I met my husband at the University of Nebraska, where he was, in my opinion, the greatest Quarterback to ever play the game. Yes, I think that highly of my husband :) God matched me with the most amazing man, and I think he's pretty perfect. When we began to date, I was so in love with him, his humble demeanor, his his sense of humor, the way he hugged me and I felt like everything was going to be ok, it didn't occur to me that he could ever be a football coach. I had grown up as the daughter of a football coach, and honestly, it's probably best I didn't see it coming, because I'm not sure I could have willingly signed up to be the wife of a football coach.
The spectrum of social media has vastly changed football. It has changed game day, coaching preparations, recruiting, pretty much everything. It has changed the way we watch it, it has changed what it means to be a fan. It has changed what it means to be a player and a coach. Now that every single player's move is being accounted for, on the field and off the field, we all have this opportunity to sit on our couches and judge. Sure, we did this before, but we were just judging the game. We weren't judging their personal lives, or the comment they made after the game in anger. The comment that can now be played out on YouTube over, and over, and over again. I made so many mistakes in college. I am lucky that I was so old that Facebook was just emerging at the end of college for me. I can't imagine all the mistakes I made compounded with social media.
I have always loved football. I can't remember a moment that football wasn't king in my house. My dad has been a football coach for my whole life. We have moved all over the country following his successes and cheering him on. He is the most hard working, classy individual I have ever known. And he has instilled in me a great, passionate love for this game. However, in the last 18 months a little piece of my heart was torn out that I don't think is ever going to be replaced. I don't think I'm ever going to see this game the same. When my dad was released from Texas A&M University after pouring his entire heart, soul and being into the job, the University, and the men on the team that he hand picked, I crumbled. I questioned my God. I questioned everything about this world, the only world I've known. I didn't understand why someone who had worked so hard for a program and brought it to the brink of insane success wasn't allowed to see that success through.
And you truly, truly cannot imagine the sting that I feel watching that happening. I know that other people have endured pain, and heartache. But it's just so hard what it's like to explain how it feels to have all these life events play out on such a public scale. I don't have hate that I had in my younger years, and I'm thankful to God for that, because I know he has given me the strength to move past that. My dad was let go from the Green Bay Packers when I was 23, and this time around is very different. I had a lot of hate then, but things are different now. I'm not sure that I'm older and wiser, I think I just know that the hate isn't going to get me anywhere. But I'm sad. Beyond sad. My heart aches for my dad. I worked in recruiting with him for 3 years and I have never in my life been around an individual that cared more about turning a program around and bringing it back to an amazing place.
Texas A&M University is an easy place to love. It has unbelievable traditions, it's old-school fun, with some of the classiest people in the world. I love College Station. If I even think of our precious house that my husband and I built and brought my first baby home in, I begin to tear up. I became a wife in College Station. I became a mom. And I became the proudest daughter you could ever imagine watching my dad bring back the Aggies.
I'm not naive. My dad didn't have an undefeated record while he was there. And even though he's my dad and I think he's the most amazing man, I know he is not perfect. But he brought in the unbelievable talent that is the reason they are currently winning. He is an offensive line genius, if you didn't know. That offensive line protected the Heisman Trophy winner last year. And yes. He recruited and secured Johnny Manziel. I am just a little upset that my daddy doesn't get to share in the credit. I want to say again that I am not naive or stupid, and I know he wasn't the coach last year when the Aggies soared. But he brought them there. And if you are a true Aggie, then you know that. And you appreciate him for it.
This all that I want for people, for the fans, for those that don't know the ins and outs of this life to know - that when I would have loved to see my dad for dinner, he was in the office pouring over high school football tape, making sure he hand-picked not just the best players athletically, but the ones who would uphold all the ethics that represent Texas A&M University too. When I would have loved for my dad to be laying on the floor playing with my son, he was on a recruiting call, convincing countless players that yes, they had made the right decision - they were the perfect fit for Texas A&M University and it was the perfect fit for them.
You see coaches kids pay a price. I didn't get to see my dad every day growing up. Not even close. He missed a lot of hugs for boo boos, high school athletic events, bedtime prayers. But I have never doubted for one second that he loved me more than anything in the world and that he was doing the right thing. He has had such an amazing effect on everyone, and everything, he has touched, I can see now that I needed to share him. But that doesn't make it fair.
When my dad was released from the Green Bay Packers, being extremely close at the time, I went to the office with him in the middle of the night and helped him pack up his office. He was broken. I could see it everywhere on his face that he hurt and that he wanted things to be different. I can't imagine he wasn't mad, but he didn't show madness. I walked around the facility with him as he went around to each and every custodian, parking attendant, and janitor, whom he knew by name, and tipped them, and thanked them personally for all their hard work. I watched him soak up the building, every corner he turned at midnight, the office he had spent so many hours in, the office he was in, game planning, when he missed my cross country meets. And it was the first time in my life, didn't know how to help my dad. I remember that moment and it makes my heart hurt when I think about it.
I'm not suggesting that you feel sorry for me or for the people that I love who have been hurt. I am just offering this view in hopes that, even if just for a second, when you are disappointed by a play, a player, or a coach's decision, that you remember, they are just people too. Coaches have long nights with their babies who won't sleep and wake up at 5 a.m. the next day to put in an 18 hour work day to try to out play the other team. Players have girlfriends that they get in fights with and spend the night working things out. And they wake up and step out on a football field, waiting to be judged. Waiting to be judged by everyone. They want you, the fan, to scream as loud as you can and leave that game happy. They want that rush that comes after a win. Trust me, they want it more than you. We all want success. But these people are doing it on such a public forum, they don't get afforded the luxury to "mess up" and make it better. They will be fired or cut by then.
So watch the games this weekend and cheer loud for the good reasons. Cheer for the freshman who is making his debut today and will catch his first college football pass. This will be a day he will remember forever. When you find yourself questioning the call, remember that you chose to have that breakfast burrito before your 6 tailgate beers, and that wasn't the best decision was it? We all make mistakes.
This is a wonderful, amazing game. I feel so blessed to have been able to have the view I've had. I thank God every day that I married a man that is as classy and hard working as my husband, and I'm glad I'll get to carry on this life as a wife, too. I hope I can support him and pick him up when he's down. I hope in 45 years, that he has more wins than losses. And I pray every day for you daddy. I pray that you know how much I think of you, as a football coach, as a man, and as a follower of Jesus. You are undefeated in my book. Love, Sarah
In the past few months there have been a lot of articles about a certain football player named Johnny Manziel, the quarterback at Texas A&M. He has at times done things to bring attention to himself in a negative manner in the past few months. Because he won the Heisman Trophy after his unbelievable freshman year, he was thrust into the limelight, and what happened is what would probably happen for about 95% of all regular college guys - he made mistakes, and the world got to watch, and judge. He just didn't have the luxury to go through this new fish bowl life without facebook, ESPN stories, and twitter. I am not going to write an "I feel sorry for Johnny Manziel" article, mostly because I think my husband would kill me for writing a blog on him at all. I honestly don't know what you will think about this blog Zac, but I hope you will understand that I need to write it.
Most of my blogs have a purpose, all selfish. I recently wrote about my beautiful sister Kathryn who has down syndrome, and the lessons she has taught me. I want to think of Kathryn and smile and remember those things that she has taught me. I don't really know what the purpose of this blog is except to be therapy for me. So here I go. I am going to write a little ditty about what I think that about the current game of football, and maybe what we can all learn from it.
With the start of the NFL regular season last weekend I am brought back. I feel the all too familiar knots in my stomach and I will spend every Sunday (or in this season's case, 2 Mondays and a Thursday night too) feeling like I will puke at any second watching what is just a game, but for my family, so much more.
I have never known what it is like to watch football as a fan. I truly cannot imagine showing up to a football game and just enjoying it, stress free. I have watched this crazy game as a daughter who loves her dad more than anything in the world. And I have watched my dad endure both some of the coolest moments and hardest disappointments. I have watched as a girlfriend crazily in love with the man on the field getting sacked. I have stood next to him while he gets told by a trainer after the game to not go to sleep for a few hours because he has endured a concussion. And now, I watch as a loving wife of a coach knowing my family is depending on my husband's paycheck and job.
I met my husband at the University of Nebraska, where he was, in my opinion, the greatest Quarterback to ever play the game. Yes, I think that highly of my husband :) God matched me with the most amazing man, and I think he's pretty perfect. When we began to date, I was so in love with him, his humble demeanor, his his sense of humor, the way he hugged me and I felt like everything was going to be ok, it didn't occur to me that he could ever be a football coach. I had grown up as the daughter of a football coach, and honestly, it's probably best I didn't see it coming, because I'm not sure I could have willingly signed up to be the wife of a football coach.
The spectrum of social media has vastly changed football. It has changed game day, coaching preparations, recruiting, pretty much everything. It has changed the way we watch it, it has changed what it means to be a fan. It has changed what it means to be a player and a coach. Now that every single player's move is being accounted for, on the field and off the field, we all have this opportunity to sit on our couches and judge. Sure, we did this before, but we were just judging the game. We weren't judging their personal lives, or the comment they made after the game in anger. The comment that can now be played out on YouTube over, and over, and over again. I made so many mistakes in college. I am lucky that I was so old that Facebook was just emerging at the end of college for me. I can't imagine all the mistakes I made compounded with social media.
I have always loved football. I can't remember a moment that football wasn't king in my house. My dad has been a football coach for my whole life. We have moved all over the country following his successes and cheering him on. He is the most hard working, classy individual I have ever known. And he has instilled in me a great, passionate love for this game. However, in the last 18 months a little piece of my heart was torn out that I don't think is ever going to be replaced. I don't think I'm ever going to see this game the same. When my dad was released from Texas A&M University after pouring his entire heart, soul and being into the job, the University, and the men on the team that he hand picked, I crumbled. I questioned my God. I questioned everything about this world, the only world I've known. I didn't understand why someone who had worked so hard for a program and brought it to the brink of insane success wasn't allowed to see that success through.
And you truly, truly cannot imagine the sting that I feel watching that happening. I know that other people have endured pain, and heartache. But it's just so hard what it's like to explain how it feels to have all these life events play out on such a public scale. I don't have hate that I had in my younger years, and I'm thankful to God for that, because I know he has given me the strength to move past that. My dad was let go from the Green Bay Packers when I was 23, and this time around is very different. I had a lot of hate then, but things are different now. I'm not sure that I'm older and wiser, I think I just know that the hate isn't going to get me anywhere. But I'm sad. Beyond sad. My heart aches for my dad. I worked in recruiting with him for 3 years and I have never in my life been around an individual that cared more about turning a program around and bringing it back to an amazing place.
Texas A&M University is an easy place to love. It has unbelievable traditions, it's old-school fun, with some of the classiest people in the world. I love College Station. If I even think of our precious house that my husband and I built and brought my first baby home in, I begin to tear up. I became a wife in College Station. I became a mom. And I became the proudest daughter you could ever imagine watching my dad bring back the Aggies.
I'm not naive. My dad didn't have an undefeated record while he was there. And even though he's my dad and I think he's the most amazing man, I know he is not perfect. But he brought in the unbelievable talent that is the reason they are currently winning. He is an offensive line genius, if you didn't know. That offensive line protected the Heisman Trophy winner last year. And yes. He recruited and secured Johnny Manziel. I am just a little upset that my daddy doesn't get to share in the credit. I want to say again that I am not naive or stupid, and I know he wasn't the coach last year when the Aggies soared. But he brought them there. And if you are a true Aggie, then you know that. And you appreciate him for it.
This all that I want for people, for the fans, for those that don't know the ins and outs of this life to know - that when I would have loved to see my dad for dinner, he was in the office pouring over high school football tape, making sure he hand-picked not just the best players athletically, but the ones who would uphold all the ethics that represent Texas A&M University too. When I would have loved for my dad to be laying on the floor playing with my son, he was on a recruiting call, convincing countless players that yes, they had made the right decision - they were the perfect fit for Texas A&M University and it was the perfect fit for them.
You see coaches kids pay a price. I didn't get to see my dad every day growing up. Not even close. He missed a lot of hugs for boo boos, high school athletic events, bedtime prayers. But I have never doubted for one second that he loved me more than anything in the world and that he was doing the right thing. He has had such an amazing effect on everyone, and everything, he has touched, I can see now that I needed to share him. But that doesn't make it fair.
When my dad was released from the Green Bay Packers, being extremely close at the time, I went to the office with him in the middle of the night and helped him pack up his office. He was broken. I could see it everywhere on his face that he hurt and that he wanted things to be different. I can't imagine he wasn't mad, but he didn't show madness. I walked around the facility with him as he went around to each and every custodian, parking attendant, and janitor, whom he knew by name, and tipped them, and thanked them personally for all their hard work. I watched him soak up the building, every corner he turned at midnight, the office he had spent so many hours in, the office he was in, game planning, when he missed my cross country meets. And it was the first time in my life, didn't know how to help my dad. I remember that moment and it makes my heart hurt when I think about it.
I'm not suggesting that you feel sorry for me or for the people that I love who have been hurt. I am just offering this view in hopes that, even if just for a second, when you are disappointed by a play, a player, or a coach's decision, that you remember, they are just people too. Coaches have long nights with their babies who won't sleep and wake up at 5 a.m. the next day to put in an 18 hour work day to try to out play the other team. Players have girlfriends that they get in fights with and spend the night working things out. And they wake up and step out on a football field, waiting to be judged. Waiting to be judged by everyone. They want you, the fan, to scream as loud as you can and leave that game happy. They want that rush that comes after a win. Trust me, they want it more than you. We all want success. But these people are doing it on such a public forum, they don't get afforded the luxury to "mess up" and make it better. They will be fired or cut by then.
So watch the games this weekend and cheer loud for the good reasons. Cheer for the freshman who is making his debut today and will catch his first college football pass. This will be a day he will remember forever. When you find yourself questioning the call, remember that you chose to have that breakfast burrito before your 6 tailgate beers, and that wasn't the best decision was it? We all make mistakes.
This is a wonderful, amazing game. I feel so blessed to have been able to have the view I've had. I thank God every day that I married a man that is as classy and hard working as my husband, and I'm glad I'll get to carry on this life as a wife, too. I hope I can support him and pick him up when he's down. I hope in 45 years, that he has more wins than losses. And I pray every day for you daddy. I pray that you know how much I think of you, as a football coach, as a man, and as a follower of Jesus. You are undefeated in my book. Love, Sarah
Monday, September 2, 2013
Dear Mom
There is so much nobody tells you about before you become a mom. It's probably smart, because I'm pretty sure nobody would ever do it, purposely anyway. Sure there's the grumpy frazzled lady who tells you, "you have no idea how tired you will be!" but you smile empathetically at her and just know you will be different. You envision yourself looking like a goddess at 3 a.m. rocking your baby gently back to sleep. You have no idea that you will have crust in your eyes, your face and teeth won't have have been washed in days and you will actually be crying. But it's ok because we are all in this together.
So I decided I think it would be a good idea if there was actually a pamphlet they gave out at the hospital to new moms along with all the breastfeeding suggestions and SIDs warnings. I would title it something like "You are entering the craziest time in your life that will at times be a nightmare but it's also beautiful. Buckle up, sweetheart." I never claimed to be good at pamphlet titles.
1. Not even that new kickboxing pilates class and a gluten free diet is going to bring back your college body. She's gone. Move on.
I gained a LOT of weight with both of my pregnancies. With hard work and determination I lost the weight both times. However, it took me a very long time with each postpartum period, and things do not look the exact same. This second time around I am a bit more at peace with that.
There is a woman at the Y with a body I totally envy. I admit, I kind of stalk her and may or may not sometimes follow her around following her routine. I am pretty sure she has some kind of restraining order on me. I think it's hard not to covet other people's things when you're a mom, whether it's her hot new purse, her perkier butt, or the fact that she has on eye makeup at the Y and you haven't even brushed your hair in 3 weeks. I think being a mom is a lot about coming to peace with what you have. My boobs look like someone dropped an aging clementine in old panty hose. But these old knockers gave 2 growing boys nourishment for 19 total months. My stomach has stretch marks I didn't plan on. But that stomach housed the 2 best things that have ever happened to me. I have permanent bags under my eyes from the lack of sleep I have gotten in the last 3 years. But I have two beautiful children who love me. Coming to peace with the mom body is hard. There have been days I have felt like giving up and have drowned my sorrows in trader joe's cookie butter. But I would like to think those are behind me, and if God has any more sweet babies for me, that I will come to peace with my battle scars. I also pray a little bit that they create an outpatient boob lift.
2. You will be so tired your face will feel like it's going to fall off.
This isn't 60 hour workweek tired. It's a new level of tired. Like, you probably shouldn't operate heavy machinery tired. You know that feeling when you take NyQuil and it's just starting to set in and make your face feel sorta like you could peel it off? Oh good you know then. That's how you're going to feel. Forever. Coffee does help but it just sort of masks the effect, so your face will still feel like it's going to fall off but your legs will keep moving and your arms will keep folding laundry. This brings on the effect that you are outside of your body watching your day go on. And this is what it's like to be a mom.
3. There will be days you love being a mom so much you will feel it was your destiny and calling. There will be days you feel like spending your grocery money on a one-way ticket to Ibiza. Both normal. Both ok.
I spent last Saturday in the ER because I haven't felt like myself since a recent bout of food poisoning. The male nurse was asking me questions while he was trying to put the IV in and asked me what I do. I told him I was a stay-at-home mom. He looked at me increduously and said, "You don't do anything else?" In this day and age of the do-it-all woman, it's almost shameful if you are not also juggling a full-time job, president position at the PTA, a side business where you dress animals like people and take their pictures, and also make the best pumpkin pie at the county fair. Yes, I told him, all I do is raise my children. All my day is focused on making sure they are happy, and fed, and have kind hearts that want to follow Jesus. I actually got really mad afterwards, that someone could make me feel small for just being a mom. It is hard work, and even though I went to grad school and loved working, I really, really, really wanted to be a mom. And just being a mom is OK. In fact it's wonderful. If you are a mom who does one million things and that makes you happy, then that is so wonderful. If you're a mom who is just a mom and that makes you happy, then that's really wonderful too. I just want to stop with all the competing. I don't scrapbook my children's every breath. I don't make homemade baby food. I just nursed 9 months. I AM NOT SUPERWOMAN. I do rock them to sleep most nights. I do tell them how much I love them all day long. I do take care of a husband too. And I do consider it my responsibility to look after his heart, too. I'm just me. And that's ok.
This morning my 2 year old pooped all over our white slipcover couch. My 9 month old threw up all over our oriental rug about 90 seconds after that because he was eating an apple of the 2 year old's that I didn't notice because I was cleaning up said poop. These kind of mornings definitely err more on the one-way flight to Ibiza side. I always, always think, how in the world would I bring more children into this hot mess? But I'm sure we would have mornings like this, and I'm sure there would be really good mornings too.
4. You will have constant Mom guilt. Nothing is just yours anymore.
Ahh. The mom guilt. Once you lay eyes on that baby, everything about what you do and feel will change. If you finally get a break and get to run to the grocery alone, you will feel guilty the baby had to take a bottle not from you. If your husband takes over night duty for one night, you will feel terrible they didn't get to gaze into your eyes. You feel totally responsible for these little people and their happiness and well being. It's a lot of pressure. I could be wrong but I think that women handle this differently than men. Of course my husband loves our kids and worries about them during the day and if they are happy and healthy. But women just carry this burden so much heavier, it seems to me. I suppose it goes along with how I love them, so much it almost makes my heart heavy. Being a mom is a lot of emotional work! But the rewards are so wonderful you can't even really touch on them. When your child does something that you are proud of, there is really no better feeling in the entire world. The emotional journey to get there just may kill me though.
5. You're doing a good job, momma.
Last but not least. Challenge for today. If you are a woman, while you are out today, try to encourage a mom. We all need it. Find a mom. Doesn't matter if she looks frazzled or on top of the world. Deep down, we are all doubting ourselves. Am I doing this right, will my children need intense therapy, will they grow up to be kind people.....look her straight in the eyes and say, wow, your kids are beautiful. You are doing a great job! And watch her walk away with an extra bounce in your step. Pat yourself on the back and reward yourself with a dove chocolate. And if you're already a mom, you are doing a really good job :)
So I decided I think it would be a good idea if there was actually a pamphlet they gave out at the hospital to new moms along with all the breastfeeding suggestions and SIDs warnings. I would title it something like "You are entering the craziest time in your life that will at times be a nightmare but it's also beautiful. Buckle up, sweetheart." I never claimed to be good at pamphlet titles.
1. Not even that new kickboxing pilates class and a gluten free diet is going to bring back your college body. She's gone. Move on.
I gained a LOT of weight with both of my pregnancies. With hard work and determination I lost the weight both times. However, it took me a very long time with each postpartum period, and things do not look the exact same. This second time around I am a bit more at peace with that.
There is a woman at the Y with a body I totally envy. I admit, I kind of stalk her and may or may not sometimes follow her around following her routine. I am pretty sure she has some kind of restraining order on me. I think it's hard not to covet other people's things when you're a mom, whether it's her hot new purse, her perkier butt, or the fact that she has on eye makeup at the Y and you haven't even brushed your hair in 3 weeks. I think being a mom is a lot about coming to peace with what you have. My boobs look like someone dropped an aging clementine in old panty hose. But these old knockers gave 2 growing boys nourishment for 19 total months. My stomach has stretch marks I didn't plan on. But that stomach housed the 2 best things that have ever happened to me. I have permanent bags under my eyes from the lack of sleep I have gotten in the last 3 years. But I have two beautiful children who love me. Coming to peace with the mom body is hard. There have been days I have felt like giving up and have drowned my sorrows in trader joe's cookie butter. But I would like to think those are behind me, and if God has any more sweet babies for me, that I will come to peace with my battle scars. I also pray a little bit that they create an outpatient boob lift.
2. You will be so tired your face will feel like it's going to fall off.
This isn't 60 hour workweek tired. It's a new level of tired. Like, you probably shouldn't operate heavy machinery tired. You know that feeling when you take NyQuil and it's just starting to set in and make your face feel sorta like you could peel it off? Oh good you know then. That's how you're going to feel. Forever. Coffee does help but it just sort of masks the effect, so your face will still feel like it's going to fall off but your legs will keep moving and your arms will keep folding laundry. This brings on the effect that you are outside of your body watching your day go on. And this is what it's like to be a mom.
3. There will be days you love being a mom so much you will feel it was your destiny and calling. There will be days you feel like spending your grocery money on a one-way ticket to Ibiza. Both normal. Both ok.
I spent last Saturday in the ER because I haven't felt like myself since a recent bout of food poisoning. The male nurse was asking me questions while he was trying to put the IV in and asked me what I do. I told him I was a stay-at-home mom. He looked at me increduously and said, "You don't do anything else?" In this day and age of the do-it-all woman, it's almost shameful if you are not also juggling a full-time job, president position at the PTA, a side business where you dress animals like people and take their pictures, and also make the best pumpkin pie at the county fair. Yes, I told him, all I do is raise my children. All my day is focused on making sure they are happy, and fed, and have kind hearts that want to follow Jesus. I actually got really mad afterwards, that someone could make me feel small for just being a mom. It is hard work, and even though I went to grad school and loved working, I really, really, really wanted to be a mom. And just being a mom is OK. In fact it's wonderful. If you are a mom who does one million things and that makes you happy, then that is so wonderful. If you're a mom who is just a mom and that makes you happy, then that's really wonderful too. I just want to stop with all the competing. I don't scrapbook my children's every breath. I don't make homemade baby food. I just nursed 9 months. I AM NOT SUPERWOMAN. I do rock them to sleep most nights. I do tell them how much I love them all day long. I do take care of a husband too. And I do consider it my responsibility to look after his heart, too. I'm just me. And that's ok.
This morning my 2 year old pooped all over our white slipcover couch. My 9 month old threw up all over our oriental rug about 90 seconds after that because he was eating an apple of the 2 year old's that I didn't notice because I was cleaning up said poop. These kind of mornings definitely err more on the one-way flight to Ibiza side. I always, always think, how in the world would I bring more children into this hot mess? But I'm sure we would have mornings like this, and I'm sure there would be really good mornings too.
4. You will have constant Mom guilt. Nothing is just yours anymore.
Ahh. The mom guilt. Once you lay eyes on that baby, everything about what you do and feel will change. If you finally get a break and get to run to the grocery alone, you will feel guilty the baby had to take a bottle not from you. If your husband takes over night duty for one night, you will feel terrible they didn't get to gaze into your eyes. You feel totally responsible for these little people and their happiness and well being. It's a lot of pressure. I could be wrong but I think that women handle this differently than men. Of course my husband loves our kids and worries about them during the day and if they are happy and healthy. But women just carry this burden so much heavier, it seems to me. I suppose it goes along with how I love them, so much it almost makes my heart heavy. Being a mom is a lot of emotional work! But the rewards are so wonderful you can't even really touch on them. When your child does something that you are proud of, there is really no better feeling in the entire world. The emotional journey to get there just may kill me though.
5. You're doing a good job, momma.
Last but not least. Challenge for today. If you are a woman, while you are out today, try to encourage a mom. We all need it. Find a mom. Doesn't matter if she looks frazzled or on top of the world. Deep down, we are all doubting ourselves. Am I doing this right, will my children need intense therapy, will they grow up to be kind people.....look her straight in the eyes and say, wow, your kids are beautiful. You are doing a great job! And watch her walk away with an extra bounce in your step. Pat yourself on the back and reward yourself with a dove chocolate. And if you're already a mom, you are doing a really good job :)
Thursday, August 8, 2013
What I learned from my sister Kathryn
I have been lucky enough to host my sister in law Kathryn here at our house for a few days. She is 28 years old and has down syndrome. She is hilarious, thoughtful, kind, loves on my kids, and I'm so happy she got to come stay with us and I got to spoil her a little.
As I should have probably expected I learned a few lessons from Kathryn this week. I have always known her to be bubbly and the friendliest person I have ever met, and being around her sporadically over the past 7 or eight years I always leave her presence feeling happy and reminded that I need to appreciate things. However, being with her constantly for a few days really brought these lessons and perspective to a whole new level.
1. Expect the best in people
Everywhere we went this week, Kathryn talked to everyone. Men, women, old, young, the world is this girl's oyster. The thing about Kathryn is she expects that every person is going to be her new best friend, and isn't this really how we all should be living? I saw the grumpy lifeguard at the YMCA who never smiles, ever, come out of his shell and talk to this sweet girl for 30 minutes. I saw people all over town brighten up just a little with Kathryn's presence because, quite frankly, you can't help it. This is something that I really needed to be reminded of. Why wouldn't I want to walk around every day like someone just gave me a free puppy? Life is good, I have so much to be thankful for, and God expects me to be a disciple of his and go out and spread Joy. SO happy he sent me Kathryn to remind me of this. This girl traveled by herself from Oklahoma City all the way to Ft Lauderdale. She took 2 separate flights and even stopped on her second flight, and as I expected she rocked it! She had absolutely no fear about the day and I think it must be so wonderful to live in a place where you expect people to be kind, and therefore expect a day of travel to be fun, and why would it be scary!?
2. Share your Joy. Appreciate your parents.
These two went hand in hand for Kathryn this week. At every realization that we were doing something fun and exciting, she wanted to tell someone, and she wanted to share it with her parents. If she was eating a cheeseburger, before she took that second bite, she wanted to make sure her parents knew how lucky she was to be eating that cheeseburger. On the way to the beach? Better tell my parents!
Why wouldn't we share our joy with everyone? It's just such a happy place to live. Wouldn't it be amazing if your best friend shared when they were happy? And genuinely celebrated with you when you were happy? That's the thing about Kathryn as well - it's not just about her. She wants you to be joyous with her!
This appreciation Kathryn has for her parents also reminded me how lucky I am to have such wonderful moms. My mom adopted my youngest sister Selena and has been an unbelievable example to me in selflessness. She always puts her family first and has spent her whole life moving around so that my dad's career could become what it has. She is the most generous person I have ever known. She is generous of her time, and has taught me so much about being a wonderful wife and mother in a very tough profession. I never appreciated how hard it must have been growing up to move constantly and handle 4 children, then to feel the calling to adopt a fifth. Now that I have my own children and a husband who is working in this profession, I am in awe at what she has done for our family. Love you Karbear.
I also have the utmost respect for the sacrifices my mother in law Julie made. Though I know she would never use the word sacrifice. She is such an awesome mom and has raised Kathryn to be the most special girl you could ever hope to meet. All of her children, including my husband, are God-fearing people with huge hearts. That's really all I could ever hope for in my boys. She has also welcomed me into their family as if I was her daughter from day 1. I'm pretty lucky!
3. Slow down the moments and love on your kids.
Every time she was with one of my boys Kathryn slowed her pace. This girl is a nonstop energized machine, so this was a noticeable difference. She stopped what she was doing, got down on their level, whether it was my 2 year old or baby, and smiled kindly at them. She stopped to sit with Brooks and talk about dinosaurs. She crouched on her knees and pushed Thomas the Train around the station for 20 minutes even though I knew it didn't interest her one bit. She did it for my Brooks. She put down her phone, ignored her show, and was all in.
When we got home from a really busy day at the YMCA swimming, Luke was crying and I knew he was overtired. I planned to get him in his crib as fast as possible so he could rest. My sister had other plans. She asked kindly to rock my baby to sleep for his nap. I figured she would bounce him by his crib and put him in. Instead, she took my Luke and started to hum to him and walked him to his room. Her calm demeanor immediately calmed my screaming baby. Moving slowly, she changed his diaper, staring into his eyes and cooing the whole time. She kissed his forehead when she was done, she scooped him up, and she rocked him in her arms until he closed his eyes. I am so focused on getting through the day I can't tell you the last time I slowed down, put my phone away, and rocked my baby to sleep. Shameful!!!! This sweet girl is so good to my kids I could just burst.
4. She is intimidated by no one!
This is a picture of Kathryn on Dolphins family night with the three Miami Dolphin Quarterbacks and my husband Zac and our boys. You better believe Kathryn owned that dinner room with the entire team! Every time I turned around, she was talking to someone new, engaging them and making them laugh. After having grown up around athletes and sports my whole life, I have to say that I am not necessarily intimidated by athletes. But I have been intimidated by others in my life, and I think it has mostly been in the form of other moms who appear to be doing it all. But what good does this do me? God has equipped me with the tools I need to raise my family and be a good wife to my husband so being intimidated, which often turns into jealously for me, does me (and my family) no good. The thing about this attitude is that for Kathryn it comes from a place of confidence and I have so much respect for that! She walks in the room and she knows she is smart, funny, and lively, and those around her can't help but notice too.
I often look back and read certain blogs and I look forward to reading this in a year on a rainy day when I need to be reminded of all the things my sister Kathryn has taught me. Love you sis! Can't wait for our next girls trip.
As I should have probably expected I learned a few lessons from Kathryn this week. I have always known her to be bubbly and the friendliest person I have ever met, and being around her sporadically over the past 7 or eight years I always leave her presence feeling happy and reminded that I need to appreciate things. However, being with her constantly for a few days really brought these lessons and perspective to a whole new level.
1. Expect the best in people
Everywhere we went this week, Kathryn talked to everyone. Men, women, old, young, the world is this girl's oyster. The thing about Kathryn is she expects that every person is going to be her new best friend, and isn't this really how we all should be living? I saw the grumpy lifeguard at the YMCA who never smiles, ever, come out of his shell and talk to this sweet girl for 30 minutes. I saw people all over town brighten up just a little with Kathryn's presence because, quite frankly, you can't help it. This is something that I really needed to be reminded of. Why wouldn't I want to walk around every day like someone just gave me a free puppy? Life is good, I have so much to be thankful for, and God expects me to be a disciple of his and go out and spread Joy. SO happy he sent me Kathryn to remind me of this. This girl traveled by herself from Oklahoma City all the way to Ft Lauderdale. She took 2 separate flights and even stopped on her second flight, and as I expected she rocked it! She had absolutely no fear about the day and I think it must be so wonderful to live in a place where you expect people to be kind, and therefore expect a day of travel to be fun, and why would it be scary!?
2. Share your Joy. Appreciate your parents.
These two went hand in hand for Kathryn this week. At every realization that we were doing something fun and exciting, she wanted to tell someone, and she wanted to share it with her parents. If she was eating a cheeseburger, before she took that second bite, she wanted to make sure her parents knew how lucky she was to be eating that cheeseburger. On the way to the beach? Better tell my parents!
Why wouldn't we share our joy with everyone? It's just such a happy place to live. Wouldn't it be amazing if your best friend shared when they were happy? And genuinely celebrated with you when you were happy? That's the thing about Kathryn as well - it's not just about her. She wants you to be joyous with her!
This appreciation Kathryn has for her parents also reminded me how lucky I am to have such wonderful moms. My mom adopted my youngest sister Selena and has been an unbelievable example to me in selflessness. She always puts her family first and has spent her whole life moving around so that my dad's career could become what it has. She is the most generous person I have ever known. She is generous of her time, and has taught me so much about being a wonderful wife and mother in a very tough profession. I never appreciated how hard it must have been growing up to move constantly and handle 4 children, then to feel the calling to adopt a fifth. Now that I have my own children and a husband who is working in this profession, I am in awe at what she has done for our family. Love you Karbear.
I also have the utmost respect for the sacrifices my mother in law Julie made. Though I know she would never use the word sacrifice. She is such an awesome mom and has raised Kathryn to be the most special girl you could ever hope to meet. All of her children, including my husband, are God-fearing people with huge hearts. That's really all I could ever hope for in my boys. She has also welcomed me into their family as if I was her daughter from day 1. I'm pretty lucky!
3. Slow down the moments and love on your kids.
Every time she was with one of my boys Kathryn slowed her pace. This girl is a nonstop energized machine, so this was a noticeable difference. She stopped what she was doing, got down on their level, whether it was my 2 year old or baby, and smiled kindly at them. She stopped to sit with Brooks and talk about dinosaurs. She crouched on her knees and pushed Thomas the Train around the station for 20 minutes even though I knew it didn't interest her one bit. She did it for my Brooks. She put down her phone, ignored her show, and was all in.
When we got home from a really busy day at the YMCA swimming, Luke was crying and I knew he was overtired. I planned to get him in his crib as fast as possible so he could rest. My sister had other plans. She asked kindly to rock my baby to sleep for his nap. I figured she would bounce him by his crib and put him in. Instead, she took my Luke and started to hum to him and walked him to his room. Her calm demeanor immediately calmed my screaming baby. Moving slowly, she changed his diaper, staring into his eyes and cooing the whole time. She kissed his forehead when she was done, she scooped him up, and she rocked him in her arms until he closed his eyes. I am so focused on getting through the day I can't tell you the last time I slowed down, put my phone away, and rocked my baby to sleep. Shameful!!!! This sweet girl is so good to my kids I could just burst.
4. She is intimidated by no one!
This is a picture of Kathryn on Dolphins family night with the three Miami Dolphin Quarterbacks and my husband Zac and our boys. You better believe Kathryn owned that dinner room with the entire team! Every time I turned around, she was talking to someone new, engaging them and making them laugh. After having grown up around athletes and sports my whole life, I have to say that I am not necessarily intimidated by athletes. But I have been intimidated by others in my life, and I think it has mostly been in the form of other moms who appear to be doing it all. But what good does this do me? God has equipped me with the tools I need to raise my family and be a good wife to my husband so being intimidated, which often turns into jealously for me, does me (and my family) no good. The thing about this attitude is that for Kathryn it comes from a place of confidence and I have so much respect for that! She walks in the room and she knows she is smart, funny, and lively, and those around her can't help but notice too.
I often look back and read certain blogs and I look forward to reading this in a year on a rainy day when I need to be reminded of all the things my sister Kathryn has taught me. Love you sis! Can't wait for our next girls trip.
Wednesday, July 31, 2013
Here comes 30
Yeesh writing this out makes it real. In May, I turned THIRTY. 30. I have lived 30 years. I still enter 29 on the bike at the Y and every time I think, ya the bike doesn't need to know my real age. Seems like I should definitely be more wise but I just spent a good portion of the "Holy Grail" time (when both of my children are asleep) eating Trader Joe's popcorn in my bed watching the Real Housewives of California. I'm sure I should have been doing sit ups, cleaning or something more productive.
Seems like even in my old, old age I make the same mistakes time and time again - that one-too-many glass of red wine on a weekday (my children always wake up at 5:30 a.m. the day after these decisions), buying the 4 inch wedges on clearance when I know I don't have nearly enough social outings to justify a thong sandal much less a sexy wedge, oh the list goes on.
I have thought many times before how fun it would be to go through life again with the knowledge I have now and not make those mistakes I made. How fabulous and popular I would be! But then again, I wouldn't be me, so I guess that's the reason God makes us struggle through the awkward mistakes. Here's what I would tell my former selves.
8 year old Sarah
I know you love these bows but they are obnoxious. Also, your bangs are bad and your teeth are growing in super wonky. Just get ready you are going to have braces for 4 years pretty soon. So you better start working on your personality girl because you're gonna need it.
13 year old Sarah
Oh Please do not do this. Do not shave in between your eyebrows. THIS IS A BAD IDEA. No good will come of this.
It was a typical hot Texas day. I came home from school in a determined mood. It was a Friday and I was hot on my heels to do something crazy. Change my look, stop being such an awkward teenager and wouldn't it be so fun to go back Monday with a whole new look? I skipped up to the bathroom and examined my face. Just as I had been thinking for weeks, my eyebrows were beginning to take over my face. Like angry growing caterpillars they seemed to become bushier by the second. I spent most of the day licking my pinkies and attempting to get them to lie down and I blamed this obsession with why I was barely passing science. But I was mortified to ask someone for help, so instead of plucking a few hairs with a tweezer, I went to my only other known option, Mr. Razor Blade. The kind that most people use to shave their LEGS, not their FACE. I wielded that scary little guy right down the center of my eyebrows, and you know what I got? The weirdest looking eyebrows ever, that were still bushy, and now just started in the middle of my eyebrow arch.
This was bad, and to this day my left eyebrow still hasn't grown in evenly to my right. But it's such a lesson God has taught me over and over again, as he patiently waits for me to catch up and learn. As the Bible tells us in 1 Corinthians 6: 19-20, our body is His Temple - "Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God?" Such a good reminder that we are all so lucky to have been created in him and that these vain thoughts really just hurt us.
18-22 year old Sarah
Drink a little less. Care what people think a lot less. Cherish this time. All you have to think about is yourself. In just 4 years you will have to think about your husband, a new baby, and do you want more babies?! It's about to get very real, so just enjoy these moments when your biggest decision is whether to join Kristen at the bar for a beer on the way back from the library. Enjoy these moments with your girlfriends. You are lucky to have people like this in your life.
26 year old Sarah
Post baby #1. It is not ok to wear pajama jeans. Ever. I know that they look really cute, and it's 1:30 a.m. and you're bored out of your mind nursing your little baby boy and your new mom lumps are flowing out over your real life full cotton pajamas. And that none of your jeans fit. Still, that does not make this acceptable.
Pull yourself together, slap on some blush and mascara, and get out of the house. It doesn't matter if you have reached your pre-baby weight or you're 50 lbs off. Get it together and get excited about life for the sake of you and your new baby.
Reminders to the current Sarah
It's ok Mama. You're doing a good job. Keep your chin up!
Appreciate your stomach now. It's probably just going to get worse.
It's ok to think your boys are special. This isn't vain, and it's important to remind them too.
Encourage every mom you see. Every one. You never know whose day you're going to make by telling them that you love their blouse, their new haircut, or that their kids seem very happy, and they must be a great mom. Every positive thought you think, share it with the person. Radiate happiness so that it bounces back to you.
Be kind to your husband, he's a great man and he deserves it.
You can't hug your kids too much.
You can't take too many naps. Yes, you! Stop washing the dishes and lie down. Everyone else is napping, why shouldn't you!?
Seems like even in my old, old age I make the same mistakes time and time again - that one-too-many glass of red wine on a weekday (my children always wake up at 5:30 a.m. the day after these decisions), buying the 4 inch wedges on clearance when I know I don't have nearly enough social outings to justify a thong sandal much less a sexy wedge, oh the list goes on.
I have thought many times before how fun it would be to go through life again with the knowledge I have now and not make those mistakes I made. How fabulous and popular I would be! But then again, I wouldn't be me, so I guess that's the reason God makes us struggle through the awkward mistakes. Here's what I would tell my former selves.
8 year old Sarah
I know you love these bows but they are obnoxious. Also, your bangs are bad and your teeth are growing in super wonky. Just get ready you are going to have braces for 4 years pretty soon. So you better start working on your personality girl because you're gonna need it.
13 year old Sarah
Oh Please do not do this. Do not shave in between your eyebrows. THIS IS A BAD IDEA. No good will come of this.
It was a typical hot Texas day. I came home from school in a determined mood. It was a Friday and I was hot on my heels to do something crazy. Change my look, stop being such an awkward teenager and wouldn't it be so fun to go back Monday with a whole new look? I skipped up to the bathroom and examined my face. Just as I had been thinking for weeks, my eyebrows were beginning to take over my face. Like angry growing caterpillars they seemed to become bushier by the second. I spent most of the day licking my pinkies and attempting to get them to lie down and I blamed this obsession with why I was barely passing science. But I was mortified to ask someone for help, so instead of plucking a few hairs with a tweezer, I went to my only other known option, Mr. Razor Blade. The kind that most people use to shave their LEGS, not their FACE. I wielded that scary little guy right down the center of my eyebrows, and you know what I got? The weirdest looking eyebrows ever, that were still bushy, and now just started in the middle of my eyebrow arch.
18-22 year old Sarah
Drink a little less. Care what people think a lot less. Cherish this time. All you have to think about is yourself. In just 4 years you will have to think about your husband, a new baby, and do you want more babies?! It's about to get very real, so just enjoy these moments when your biggest decision is whether to join Kristen at the bar for a beer on the way back from the library. Enjoy these moments with your girlfriends. You are lucky to have people like this in your life.
26 year old Sarah
Post baby #1. It is not ok to wear pajama jeans. Ever. I know that they look really cute, and it's 1:30 a.m. and you're bored out of your mind nursing your little baby boy and your new mom lumps are flowing out over your real life full cotton pajamas. And that none of your jeans fit. Still, that does not make this acceptable.
Pull yourself together, slap on some blush and mascara, and get out of the house. It doesn't matter if you have reached your pre-baby weight or you're 50 lbs off. Get it together and get excited about life for the sake of you and your new baby.
Reminders to the current Sarah
It's ok Mama. You're doing a good job. Keep your chin up!
Appreciate your stomach now. It's probably just going to get worse.
It's ok to think your boys are special. This isn't vain, and it's important to remind them too.
Encourage every mom you see. Every one. You never know whose day you're going to make by telling them that you love their blouse, their new haircut, or that their kids seem very happy, and they must be a great mom. Every positive thought you think, share it with the person. Radiate happiness so that it bounces back to you.
Be kind to your husband, he's a great man and he deserves it.
You can't hug your kids too much.
You can't take too many naps. Yes, you! Stop washing the dishes and lie down. Everyone else is napping, why shouldn't you!?
Tuesday, July 23, 2013
Some things I have been pondering
I'm trying to get better about blogging more often, I love sitting down to get my "adult fix" and I love to write so this is such a great outlet for me. So instead of trying to make sure each blog has a funny subject I'm going to let myself do a weekly "Things I've been pondering." Because I just know you're all dying to know......
1. Amanda Bynes got earrings in her cheeks. This is not good. Poor baby girl has been on a downward spiral for some time now, but this is a new low. If you're like me you remember this sweet girl who was on Nickelodeon's "All That," she was hilarious! Now....oh man, we have all made bad decisions (one of my worst was circa 2005 dying my hair jet black, yikes!) but this is deperessing.
I don't know how this happens. I can see the tattoo thing. Not for me but I could see it. I am one of those people who acts way too much on impulse so I would probably end up getting a tattoo of a huge sprinkled donut on my forearm donut during a no-carb dieting phase because it was all I could think of. But how does one wake up in the morning and think, ya know my cheeks are missing something....ding ding! Earrings! I'm calling you, Amanda Bynes, come to my house and I will put you through a little two-kids-in-diapers-both-under-three rehab, I'll have you ship shape in no time. No cheek earrings allowed.
2. I was one of those people that became overly concerned about Princess Kate's baby. I'm embarassed to admit it but the public should know the truth. At my worst I was checking my US weekly app 10-12 times a day for updates on the Royal Baby. Then when it finally came time for it I felt terrible for her. All those people waiting outside, zero privacy, feeling like the world is watching, and you're just praying that the baby isn't huge and your who-ha doesn't need stitches. On that note, can you imagine the pressure on that physician? I think I read somewhere the royal doctor was like 82, not kidding, so maybe he had enough confidence to move past that, but really can't imagine going through the motions without thinking, "that's a princess vajayjay, that's a princess vajayjay." That immaturity is exactly why I was not cut out to be doctor (and that's the only reason. HA!).
3. Whenever I go shopping in a mall that has those random kiosks with massage chairs and overly giddy looking Chinese men I'm always amazed at how much business they're getting. Who are these people that are just moseying along, done with their shopping in Sears, and decide they need a massage fully in public? That can't be relaxing at all. I want to be the person that's so relaxed they can totally mellow out in the middle of the shopping mall for a massage. No wait I don't. I think you're weird.
4. We traveled quite a bit this summer and there's nothing like traveling to make you feel like a white trash hot mess. I loved that every time we walked up to our gate to get on the airplane I felt the eyes seize on me and silently pray they weren't seated next to us. If you haven't changed a massive baby blowout diaper on an airplane in those tiny bathrooms then you really haven't lived! I am not sure when my life got so glamorous.
This year we flew Jet Blue because it was the only airline that got us from Ft. Lauderdale to Boston on a straight flight, and since we still had to rent the car and drive to Cape Cod I wanted to make the trip as easy as possible. The airline is a little more expensive but you get a personal TV and snacks each way! It's amazing how the little things when you're up in the air feel like the biggest luxuries. I guess it's because I'm just on survival mode but when you're drowning and a lady is handing you endless bags of animal crackers, it's like a lifesaver.
When traveling there is one particular person I began to resent: random Emo/Skater looking boys. I would notice them all over, and the main reason is that they weigh less than I do and their little skinny jeans would not fit my booty. There was one in particular on one of our flights that absolutely weighed less than I did and spent the whole flight with an introspective look on his face. Listen you are 13 what do you have to be introspective about?! Take my squirmy 8 month old for 20 minutes and change a few diapers and then you can ponder.
5. This one is small. It's a sheer miracle that on the days when Brooks says "mom" repeatedly 1,000 times that I don't punch him square in the face. Just want a little respect on that one.
1. Amanda Bynes got earrings in her cheeks. This is not good. Poor baby girl has been on a downward spiral for some time now, but this is a new low. If you're like me you remember this sweet girl who was on Nickelodeon's "All That," she was hilarious! Now....oh man, we have all made bad decisions (one of my worst was circa 2005 dying my hair jet black, yikes!) but this is deperessing.
2. I was one of those people that became overly concerned about Princess Kate's baby. I'm embarassed to admit it but the public should know the truth. At my worst I was checking my US weekly app 10-12 times a day for updates on the Royal Baby. Then when it finally came time for it I felt terrible for her. All those people waiting outside, zero privacy, feeling like the world is watching, and you're just praying that the baby isn't huge and your who-ha doesn't need stitches. On that note, can you imagine the pressure on that physician? I think I read somewhere the royal doctor was like 82, not kidding, so maybe he had enough confidence to move past that, but really can't imagine going through the motions without thinking, "that's a princess vajayjay, that's a princess vajayjay." That immaturity is exactly why I was not cut out to be doctor (and that's the only reason. HA!).
3. Whenever I go shopping in a mall that has those random kiosks with massage chairs and overly giddy looking Chinese men I'm always amazed at how much business they're getting. Who are these people that are just moseying along, done with their shopping in Sears, and decide they need a massage fully in public? That can't be relaxing at all. I want to be the person that's so relaxed they can totally mellow out in the middle of the shopping mall for a massage. No wait I don't. I think you're weird.
4. We traveled quite a bit this summer and there's nothing like traveling to make you feel like a white trash hot mess. I loved that every time we walked up to our gate to get on the airplane I felt the eyes seize on me and silently pray they weren't seated next to us. If you haven't changed a massive baby blowout diaper on an airplane in those tiny bathrooms then you really haven't lived! I am not sure when my life got so glamorous.
This year we flew Jet Blue because it was the only airline that got us from Ft. Lauderdale to Boston on a straight flight, and since we still had to rent the car and drive to Cape Cod I wanted to make the trip as easy as possible. The airline is a little more expensive but you get a personal TV and snacks each way! It's amazing how the little things when you're up in the air feel like the biggest luxuries. I guess it's because I'm just on survival mode but when you're drowning and a lady is handing you endless bags of animal crackers, it's like a lifesaver.
When traveling there is one particular person I began to resent: random Emo/Skater looking boys. I would notice them all over, and the main reason is that they weigh less than I do and their little skinny jeans would not fit my booty. There was one in particular on one of our flights that absolutely weighed less than I did and spent the whole flight with an introspective look on his face. Listen you are 13 what do you have to be introspective about?! Take my squirmy 8 month old for 20 minutes and change a few diapers and then you can ponder.
5. This one is small. It's a sheer miracle that on the days when Brooks says "mom" repeatedly 1,000 times that I don't punch him square in the face. Just want a little respect on that one.
Friday, July 12, 2013
Why I would be precious at being a royal
Even more than this e-card, however, I do know one thing is for sure, and that it's in another life, I should definitely be a Royal. Yes. The kind that lives in England and is related to the queen. I have never been a Royal, but I just know I would be darling at it!
Ok here's the real story. I have become slightly obsessed with Princess Kate. Like, if her people were "looking into me" because of the amount of times I have checked up on whether she has had her baby or not, I would not be totally shocked. If her hospital was in the same city as mine, let's just say I would have made a really good janitor/nurse type friend at said hospital that would let me in to visit her immediately after she delivered, because obviously we would be best friends if we met, I just know it. Will and Zac would just sit around talking football, and I would give her tons of baby advice like how it's ok if food drops on the ground and the baby eats it if it's within a reasonable amount of time, or how it's ok to have a beer while breastfeeding because it helps with letdown. Classy, helpful stuff like that. We would have to learn how to play cricket I suppose but that's fine. We would be the cutest couples! But first, I would need to be a Royal and this is why I would be darling at it.
1. I have a face for the people. I am pretty sure I just have a really relate-able face. Not too jarring, not too striking, just your every day, loveable-princessy type of face. See below, that's my sister and I waiting on my mom and other sister in a Talbots over vacation. If I were the princess wouldn't you be all "gosh there she is, Princess Sarah being so normal! Don't you love her?!"
2. I look really good in a hat. Like wow, really good. See above. Nuff said.
3. I could drink tea in the afternoon. I actually don't love tea but I do know how to raise my pinky. Hey, I could drink a dirty martini at 3 p.m. if it's in a castle, whatever. But I really do love biscuits and I am pretty sure they give you biscuits with the tea.
4. My scandalous times are behind me, and I'm ready to be classy. Yes it's true. My days of drinking wine out of the bag (that comes in the box) are behind me, mostly because I have 2 children and having even a slight hangover with children is both the most awful and trashy feeling of all time. So I've decided to be classy until I'm at least 48ish and they're out of the house. If I were a royal, I would strongly consider extending that time and I think I could be classy longer, otherwise the papers will have it out for me and we can't have that! But people would appreciate that I have overcome some hurdles so I'm assuming my previous scandals would be "cute" and "what makes Princess Sarah approachable."
5. That accent would be precious on me. I am sooo good at accents so it would be super easy to learn. (Truth, every accent for every country is the same and they all sound like a confused person from India). I could be like Madonna, spend a few months over there and bam, cutest accent ever.
Since I already married my prince I guess my only shot at becoming a royal in this life is to become best friends with Princess Kate, which is already in my plans anyway. I just have to figure out how to get over there and set up a play date, because then I would be in. Between my precious monsters and superb mothering advice, it would probably be mere days before they name us Honorary Royals!
Hold that baby in Princess Kate I'm coming!
Thursday, May 9, 2013
A Day In the Life of a Mom: Glamorous vs. Unglamorous
We all know what our vision of mommyhood looked like before it actually happened. Perfectly crisp jean capris and white eyelet tank tops for trips to the park, loving and adoring children who spoke french but just couldn't quite master Mandorin which we found adorable, a sandwiches cut into lions and laughter that echoed in a big 5 bedroom house with a sprawling porch where I drink lemonade and wait for my children to skip home from school.
I can't seem to find this life so if you tell me where I can get one of those I will pay you all the money in my purse which is approximately 10.76 plus a race car, a diaper and a lollipop without the wrapper.
Here is what that glamorous life looks like compared to my real, unglamorous life (which I do love).
5:47 a.m.
Glamorous - I wake up to get an early morning 3 mile run on my treadmill. I don't even need a cup of coffee because I feel so refreshed. I help myself to all the fresh fruit I have pre-diced and pat myself on the back for getting so many antioxidants in before 6 a.m.
Unglamorous - I step on 3 plastic dinasours on the way to the Keurig to make a cup of coffee. It feels like nails going into my feet and I curse the toys. With my eyes crusted shut I accidentally add orange juice to the last coffee pod I have thereby rendering myself coffee-less and unable to function. I consider calling 911.
7:13 a.m.
Glamorous - My children awake one by one cheerfully and tell me they love me repeatedly. I feel them farm fresh scrambled eggs and strawberries and we talk about what we will do with our day and if Miley Cyrus is really ending her engagement.
Unglamorous - My kids have been awake an hour and already I think that if I hear the Doc McStuffins theme song one more time I will have a nervous breakdown. My 2 year old is gathering all the smallest and most chokeable toys to place in front of my 6 month old, who is rolling around on the tile. When I ask him to stop he gets frustrated and begins to cover the baby with blankets, focusing mostly on his face.
8:47 a.m.
Glamorous - After spending an hour on our French and Mandorin skills we retreat to the backyard where we do yoga poses together in the perfect 72 degree weather. We finish off our session with a fruit smoothie and chalk drawings in the driveway where they color me to resemble Gwyneth Paltrow so closely I wonder if we are related and I just don't know it.
Unglamorous - I gather my crew to go to the YMCA because they offer 2 hours of free childcare and I plan to use 1 hour and 59 minutes of said childcare. It takes 39 minutes to exit the house and it is 98 degrees with 100% humidity in Florida. I haven't washed my hair in 4 days but despite it's greasiness the humidity has caused my hair to rise enough to resemble a chia pet.
12:53 p.m.
Glamorous - My children all begin to yawn and request to go to sleep, and then after admitting that I'm really busy, suggest that they might as well put themselves to sleep. Then there is a 3 hour Beverly Hills Housewives marathon which I keep on for background noise while I work tirelessly on my new invention, cookie dough that burns calories while you eat it.
Unglamorous - Even though I'm edging on nap time I decide to run into the grocery store. My 6 month old has a blow out diaper in the bjorn in the bakery section and poop begins to drip everywhere. My 2 year old screams loudly EWWW EWWWW and backs away from us like he has never met us and has someone else to go home with. I look around, panicked, at all the people dry heaving and I'm frozen. I have no idea what to do so I shrug, grab some salami and move on, with poop running down my Lululemon workout pants that cost $90 and curse the day I ever bought $90 workout pants.
(This actually happened today. Gems!)
1:47 p.m.
Glamorous - I decide to catch a quick snooze in the backyard where I simultaneously get the perfect sun bronzed tan without getting any age spots. I pour myself a large margarita because in fantasy world it's normal to have afternoon cocktails, not trashy like pouring wine in a solo cup (which I've never done, nope not ever).
Unglamorous - I continue to negotiate with my 2 year old on him taking a nap like I'm dealing with a murderer, promising new toys and M&Ms in exchange for a 45 minute sleep period. I have lost all control in this situation so I go to nurse my 6 month old who is getting 5 new teeth so it's like feeding 9 piranhas. I begin to research Vasectomies on my Iphone.
4:17 p.m.
Glamorous - Since I was able to use the entire nap time to clean the house, bake a pie and pretty myself for my husband's return home from work I suggest to the kids to help me with dinner prep, which is roast chicken with really colorful vegetables that have fancy names and a chocolate mousse that doesn't have calories.
Unglamorous - Since I spent my whole nap time paying bills and calling the Sears Oven Repairman I set up toys in the bathroom so I can shower and watch my children destroy each other. They bang on the window of the shower and ask me what "mountains" (boobs) are and I wonder at what age I must assume I am scaring them for life and setting up weekly therapy sessions. During the 12 seconds I had to close my eyes to shampoo my hair my 2 year old has pulled out all my brushes and given my 6 month old a hairball to play with.
7:47 p.m.
Glamorous - Once my beautiful boys are peacefully sleeping I retreat to my buidore where I change into a silk nightie that highlights my perfectly rounded bottom from the 1,000 squats I do each morning as I brush my teeth. I await my adoring husband who I can see through the window chopping firewood in tight jeans and a see through white shirt.
Unglamorous - All children are inprison their cribs so I retreat to my bed and life face down in my pillow like a dead body. Husband gives me make out eyes and says he's going to brush his teeth. Even though I'm aware this is a hint to brush my teeth too I must conserve all energy for said make out. I lick my hand like a cheetah and slick back my hair and my eyebrows and try not to look almost dead.
9:01 p.m.
Glamorous - I apply all night creams and serums and peacefully drift off to a perfect 9 hour slumber. Who am I kidding I don't need night creams, I am stunning.
Unglamorous - I fall asleep while watching the Office with a tin Dove chocolate wrapper stuck to my cheek. I get approximately 45 minutes of sleep before I wake up with drool crusted to my cheek as my 6 month old screams out for the 8th nursing session of the day.
I can't seem to find this life so if you tell me where I can get one of those I will pay you all the money in my purse which is approximately 10.76 plus a race car, a diaper and a lollipop without the wrapper.
Here is what that glamorous life looks like compared to my real, unglamorous life (which I do love).
5:47 a.m.
Glamorous - I wake up to get an early morning 3 mile run on my treadmill. I don't even need a cup of coffee because I feel so refreshed. I help myself to all the fresh fruit I have pre-diced and pat myself on the back for getting so many antioxidants in before 6 a.m.
Unglamorous - I step on 3 plastic dinasours on the way to the Keurig to make a cup of coffee. It feels like nails going into my feet and I curse the toys. With my eyes crusted shut I accidentally add orange juice to the last coffee pod I have thereby rendering myself coffee-less and unable to function. I consider calling 911.
7:13 a.m.
Glamorous - My children awake one by one cheerfully and tell me they love me repeatedly. I feel them farm fresh scrambled eggs and strawberries and we talk about what we will do with our day and if Miley Cyrus is really ending her engagement.
Unglamorous - My kids have been awake an hour and already I think that if I hear the Doc McStuffins theme song one more time I will have a nervous breakdown. My 2 year old is gathering all the smallest and most chokeable toys to place in front of my 6 month old, who is rolling around on the tile. When I ask him to stop he gets frustrated and begins to cover the baby with blankets, focusing mostly on his face.
8:47 a.m.
Glamorous - After spending an hour on our French and Mandorin skills we retreat to the backyard where we do yoga poses together in the perfect 72 degree weather. We finish off our session with a fruit smoothie and chalk drawings in the driveway where they color me to resemble Gwyneth Paltrow so closely I wonder if we are related and I just don't know it.
Unglamorous - I gather my crew to go to the YMCA because they offer 2 hours of free childcare and I plan to use 1 hour and 59 minutes of said childcare. It takes 39 minutes to exit the house and it is 98 degrees with 100% humidity in Florida. I haven't washed my hair in 4 days but despite it's greasiness the humidity has caused my hair to rise enough to resemble a chia pet.
12:53 p.m.
Glamorous - My children all begin to yawn and request to go to sleep, and then after admitting that I'm really busy, suggest that they might as well put themselves to sleep. Then there is a 3 hour Beverly Hills Housewives marathon which I keep on for background noise while I work tirelessly on my new invention, cookie dough that burns calories while you eat it.
Unglamorous - Even though I'm edging on nap time I decide to run into the grocery store. My 6 month old has a blow out diaper in the bjorn in the bakery section and poop begins to drip everywhere. My 2 year old screams loudly EWWW EWWWW and backs away from us like he has never met us and has someone else to go home with. I look around, panicked, at all the people dry heaving and I'm frozen. I have no idea what to do so I shrug, grab some salami and move on, with poop running down my Lululemon workout pants that cost $90 and curse the day I ever bought $90 workout pants.
(This actually happened today. Gems!)
1:47 p.m.
Glamorous - I decide to catch a quick snooze in the backyard where I simultaneously get the perfect sun bronzed tan without getting any age spots. I pour myself a large margarita because in fantasy world it's normal to have afternoon cocktails, not trashy like pouring wine in a solo cup (which I've never done, nope not ever).
Unglamorous - I continue to negotiate with my 2 year old on him taking a nap like I'm dealing with a murderer, promising new toys and M&Ms in exchange for a 45 minute sleep period. I have lost all control in this situation so I go to nurse my 6 month old who is getting 5 new teeth so it's like feeding 9 piranhas. I begin to research Vasectomies on my Iphone.
4:17 p.m.
Glamorous - Since I was able to use the entire nap time to clean the house, bake a pie and pretty myself for my husband's return home from work I suggest to the kids to help me with dinner prep, which is roast chicken with really colorful vegetables that have fancy names and a chocolate mousse that doesn't have calories.
Unglamorous - Since I spent my whole nap time paying bills and calling the Sears Oven Repairman I set up toys in the bathroom so I can shower and watch my children destroy each other. They bang on the window of the shower and ask me what "mountains" (boobs) are and I wonder at what age I must assume I am scaring them for life and setting up weekly therapy sessions. During the 12 seconds I had to close my eyes to shampoo my hair my 2 year old has pulled out all my brushes and given my 6 month old a hairball to play with.
7:47 p.m.
Glamorous - Once my beautiful boys are peacefully sleeping I retreat to my buidore where I change into a silk nightie that highlights my perfectly rounded bottom from the 1,000 squats I do each morning as I brush my teeth. I await my adoring husband who I can see through the window chopping firewood in tight jeans and a see through white shirt.
Unglamorous - All children are in
9:01 p.m.
Glamorous - I apply all night creams and serums and peacefully drift off to a perfect 9 hour slumber. Who am I kidding I don't need night creams, I am stunning.
Unglamorous - I fall asleep while watching the Office with a tin Dove chocolate wrapper stuck to my cheek. I get approximately 45 minutes of sleep before I wake up with drool crusted to my cheek as my 6 month old screams out for the 8th nursing session of the day.
Friday, February 1, 2013
New Year's Resolutions
I have typically not been a big New Year's Resolutions person in my past, mostly because it's just hard to become even more perfect. Baaaahahaha! This year, however, there seems to be a lot I could work on. Here are a few things I've been noting as "things to improve on/work on/do."
*Do not assume you will fit into all clothes at Forever21.
Ok fine. Do not assume you will fit into ANY clothes at Forever21. This ship has sailed, sister. She sailed away with pregnancy #2 and she ain't comin' back. Sure, you can go in. Go ahead, you won't feel badly about yourself for 2 weeks, no not at all. This is a good decision. I love that they have some fun trendy items that are priced at $2.99 but the risk to my self esteem just may not be worth it. In addition, the last time I was in this store I heard two girls talking to each other and one actually said LOL. I thought this was supposed to be a typed phrase only? For any readers who don't know, this means "laughing out loud," and it's a widely overused phrase by everyone including myself.
Example: "I had to lay down to put my jeans on today! It was like a circus me trying to pull those bad boys on! LOL!" Obviously, I am not laughing out loud when I say this. But it makes me seem cooler, and funnier, if I put it.
It also works in slightly awkward situations.
Example: "I may or may not have made out with Arnie last night. Pretty sure he's like 42. LOL."
See in this example girl is embarrassed she made out with Arnie. But by adding LOL, it makes the situation funny, and it makes it ok.
These are examples of using LOL in a typed manner. However, I'm pretty positive it was never intended to be said aloud. Are these girls really so pressed for time that they don't have the extra 2.7 seconds to say "that made me laugh out loud, Tiffany!" They must abbreviate and say LOL? Maybe they got confused because they were drinking 38 oz red bulls out of a straw. Did you know they make enormous cans of red bull now? I used to drink the stuff once in awhile in college and grad school but haven't had it since because it makes me think of Red Bull Vodkas during a time when I went out and was actively stalking my husband in an attempt to get him to date me. But that's for another blog, another time. Back then I'm pretty sure the servings were 6 oz and you can now get them in super size cans. This cannot be healthy. And I cannot keep up with the over caffeinated, teeny tiny, too busy to say laugh out loud tweens in this store. Must move on to Ann Taylor Loft and be ok with things.
*Regain bladder control.
After shooting 2 lovely young men out the yina banina things are....well they're just not as high and tight as they once were. If this blog is one thing it's gonna be honest and real and this is the honest truth. It's bizarre enough to think that I can squat out 2 watermelons in 24 months and think I'm gonna spring back to my 19 year old self. This may or may not include enlisting doctor's help. Full vaginal rejuvenation with just a small down payment?! Don't mind if I do! These commercials are on 96.5 every.single.day. I've been living in Miami too long. Back to reality: do kegals. Do kegals running. Do kegals lying down. Do kegals driving. Do kegals eating cookie dough. Stop eating cookie dough.
*Stop sitting on public restroom seats with pee on them.
Once this goal has been accomplished, begin new goal of stop sitting on public restroom seats altogether. I seem to always get the pee seat. Is there anything worse? What ladies are peeing so willy nilly everywhere? Are people dancing to Justin Bieber songs while peeing? If you are doing the squat and pee while you text and balance your diet coke and purse and this is why you have left pee all over your seat, you are doing me a disservice. I rush in there with no bladder control trying my best to make it to the potty and I all I can think is, don't pee your pants, don't pee your pants. It's a miracle I made it to this place, I don't need your pee seat to ruin my glory of not peeing my pants.
*Stop staring.
Whether it's the awkward massage centers in the middle of the mall or the girl doing the weird yoga stretch in the corner at the YMCA, I have really got to stop staring. Usually I'm around 15 seconds in on an awkward daze before I realize the person I'm staring at has grabbed their phone and are calling the police. I don't know why I do it and therefore it's probably going to be harder to stop. Just know that if I'm out and about and I am staring you down like I'm trying to figure out the meaning of a very important impressionist painting, I'm sorry, and I'm working on it.
*Improve hygienic skills.
This one will be tough. Often times the only way I'm able to shower is to set up an elaborate toy display in my bathroom for my toddler to entertain him in front of me so he doesn't burn the house down and also simultaneously breast feed by 11 week old into such a coma that he will for sure sleep through my shower. This isn't easy and usually by the time I have accomplished these two things I am so tired I have fallen asleep on the bed. The problem is, there's no doubt you've gone to a bad place when you actually decide to do your hair and swipe on some lip gloss and the regulars you see at the YMCA ask you if you have a big event that day. Oh my. Nope, just showered. And I know my hair looks fabulous today, you're welcome.
I'm sure I will come up with a few more improvements to work on in the next few weeks, but with 2013 already in February, this should keep me busy for awhile.
*Do not assume you will fit into all clothes at Forever21.
Ok fine. Do not assume you will fit into ANY clothes at Forever21. This ship has sailed, sister. She sailed away with pregnancy #2 and she ain't comin' back. Sure, you can go in. Go ahead, you won't feel badly about yourself for 2 weeks, no not at all. This is a good decision. I love that they have some fun trendy items that are priced at $2.99 but the risk to my self esteem just may not be worth it. In addition, the last time I was in this store I heard two girls talking to each other and one actually said LOL. I thought this was supposed to be a typed phrase only? For any readers who don't know, this means "laughing out loud," and it's a widely overused phrase by everyone including myself.
Example: "I had to lay down to put my jeans on today! It was like a circus me trying to pull those bad boys on! LOL!" Obviously, I am not laughing out loud when I say this. But it makes me seem cooler, and funnier, if I put it.
It also works in slightly awkward situations.
Example: "I may or may not have made out with Arnie last night. Pretty sure he's like 42. LOL."
See in this example girl is embarrassed she made out with Arnie. But by adding LOL, it makes the situation funny, and it makes it ok.
These are examples of using LOL in a typed manner. However, I'm pretty positive it was never intended to be said aloud. Are these girls really so pressed for time that they don't have the extra 2.7 seconds to say "that made me laugh out loud, Tiffany!" They must abbreviate and say LOL? Maybe they got confused because they were drinking 38 oz red bulls out of a straw. Did you know they make enormous cans of red bull now? I used to drink the stuff once in awhile in college and grad school but haven't had it since because it makes me think of Red Bull Vodkas during a time when I went out and was actively stalking my husband in an attempt to get him to date me. But that's for another blog, another time. Back then I'm pretty sure the servings were 6 oz and you can now get them in super size cans. This cannot be healthy. And I cannot keep up with the over caffeinated, teeny tiny, too busy to say laugh out loud tweens in this store. Must move on to Ann Taylor Loft and be ok with things.
*Regain bladder control.
After shooting 2 lovely young men out the yina banina things are....well they're just not as high and tight as they once were. If this blog is one thing it's gonna be honest and real and this is the honest truth. It's bizarre enough to think that I can squat out 2 watermelons in 24 months and think I'm gonna spring back to my 19 year old self. This may or may not include enlisting doctor's help. Full vaginal rejuvenation with just a small down payment?! Don't mind if I do! These commercials are on 96.5 every.single.day. I've been living in Miami too long. Back to reality: do kegals. Do kegals running. Do kegals lying down. Do kegals driving. Do kegals eating cookie dough. Stop eating cookie dough.
*Stop sitting on public restroom seats with pee on them.
Once this goal has been accomplished, begin new goal of stop sitting on public restroom seats altogether. I seem to always get the pee seat. Is there anything worse? What ladies are peeing so willy nilly everywhere? Are people dancing to Justin Bieber songs while peeing? If you are doing the squat and pee while you text and balance your diet coke and purse and this is why you have left pee all over your seat, you are doing me a disservice. I rush in there with no bladder control trying my best to make it to the potty and I all I can think is, don't pee your pants, don't pee your pants. It's a miracle I made it to this place, I don't need your pee seat to ruin my glory of not peeing my pants.
*Stop staring.
Whether it's the awkward massage centers in the middle of the mall or the girl doing the weird yoga stretch in the corner at the YMCA, I have really got to stop staring. Usually I'm around 15 seconds in on an awkward daze before I realize the person I'm staring at has grabbed their phone and are calling the police. I don't know why I do it and therefore it's probably going to be harder to stop. Just know that if I'm out and about and I am staring you down like I'm trying to figure out the meaning of a very important impressionist painting, I'm sorry, and I'm working on it.
*Improve hygienic skills.
This one will be tough. Often times the only way I'm able to shower is to set up an elaborate toy display in my bathroom for my toddler to entertain him in front of me so he doesn't burn the house down and also simultaneously breast feed by 11 week old into such a coma that he will for sure sleep through my shower. This isn't easy and usually by the time I have accomplished these two things I am so tired I have fallen asleep on the bed. The problem is, there's no doubt you've gone to a bad place when you actually decide to do your hair and swipe on some lip gloss and the regulars you see at the YMCA ask you if you have a big event that day. Oh my. Nope, just showered. And I know my hair looks fabulous today, you're welcome.
I'm sure I will come up with a few more improvements to work on in the next few weeks, but with 2013 already in February, this should keep me busy for awhile.
Friday, January 25, 2013
Have you had your placenta today?
For some reason I have been dreading this post but I'm really not sure why!? I want to write about my decision to eat my placenta after this birth because it's interesting, and everyone seems to have an opinion about it one way or another. However, as funny as it could possibly be, my reasons for deciding to eat said placenta aren't really funny at all.
I decided to do this after a lot of research into the benefits of it, but also because I experienced a LOT of sadness after the birth of my first son Brooks. I wouldn't go as far as to say that I had postpartum depression because I was lucky enough to have a lot of help from my in laws, my mom, my husband, good friends - so I wasn't ever in a state true depression, and luckily I was able to avoid taking any kind of medicine. However, I wasn't in a great place either. Having a child is hard work, and the adjustment to your life afterwards is even harder.
I know I am extremely fortunate to be able to stay at home with my 2 boys all day, but that doesn't mean that it was easy from day 1 and that every day is all happiness, sunshine and coloring books. Talking for 12 hours a day about what the zebra says (I'm sorry but what in the heck does a zebra say!?!?! I usually end up saying in a squeaky voice "I have stripes!") is a huge adjustment from working in a buzzing office and getting to talk to people (over the age of 2) every day. That's not even to mention the fact that new moms are dealing with body issues, hormones that are all over the map, and what I feel is an ever-increasing insanity of being today's "perfect mom."
Aaaah. To be a perfect mom in 2012. I am so far from it I can't even really pin down exactly what she is. But I have some examples....
*She is a size 4 and attends Pilates on Monday/Wednesdays and cardio fusion on Tuesday/Thursdays. She's chipper and cute and always has on blush.
*She has signed her children up for Spanish and Mandarin. She plans to begin lessons soon so she can help more.
*She never raises her voice and somehow follows 8 different parenting books each in perfect harmony.
Here's where I'm at:
*I work out when I can and on the days I am able to I end up spending that entire day in my stinky workout clothes 95% of the time. My 2 year old calls my stomach, when visible because I'm nursing my 10 week old, "Mama's squishy belly." I am usually chipper on Fridays.
*I'm just trying to get Brooks to be able to speak English.
*Every day brings a constant struggle not to yell at my 2 beautiful children "You are making momma crazy!" On days when I don't, I feel awesome.
But with all that being said, prayer has brought me to one very important realization: I am the perfect mom for Brooks and Luke. I do believe God chose me to be their mom and that I'm the best one for them. And there is some wonderful peace in that! I think I came to this peace through a lot of prayer, encouragement from a great husband, and 72 pills I have dubbed my "happy pills."
SO yes. I am that granola lady who ate my placenta! I hired someone to come over to my house, and dehydrate my placenta, which my husband literally walked out of the hospital room with it in a bucket emblazoned with the words "bio hazardous material." He brought it home and stuck it in our fridge like it was deli meat. In case you are wondering, it looks pretty much like I thought it would, which is pretty frightening. It looks like a human organ.
Immediately after giving birth to Luke, Zac made a joke, asking me if I was hungry - of course I replied yes, I'm always hungry, then he motioned over to the counter where my placenta was lying. Literally I am still on the operating table! I had a natural birth but I gave birth in the operating room because by the time I got there I had Luke within about 45 minutes and there weren't any rooms available. Funny memories :)
Anywho, once the placenta was home, the woman I hired for "placenta encapsulation" came over to my house to dehydrate it. I am going to post just this picture to save my readers from horror because really this just looks like beef jerky :)
After it was fully dry, she ground up the placenta in a magic bullet, just like she was running an infomercial on how to make the best smoothies. By this time I was home with my new baby and my mood was all over the place. One minute I was ecstatic, looking at him and cooing, the next I felt like I could pass out for a week. It's extremely challenging to come home with a new baby to a rambunctious and confused 2 year old, and I don't think you can really prepare yourself, you just sort of have to dive in and do it.
Once the placenta was ground up into a fine powder, she the powder into clear gel caps and made 72 pills that I could take at my discretion. She said the typical placenta makes about 40-50 pills so of course I was proud of my apparently huge placenta, whatever that means. Maybe that explains why I was enormous at the end of my pregnancy!
The typical cycle is to take 2 pills a day for 2-3 weeks and slowly wean off them and just take them "as needed." I just took 2 a day for 2 weeks, and have since only taken 1 on days when I felt more down or tired. From everything I read, the point of doing this is you are flushed with so many hormones while you are pregnant, and once you have given birth, all those hormones are gone and the drastic decrease in them as well as all the blood/iron you lose can cause huge mood fluctuations. The placenta is literally full of everything good you needed for your baby and basically, we are the only culture in the world who DOESN'T do this. Just as I suspected, the pills made me have a much more balanced feeling post-birth than I had with Brooks.
There were days after Brooks' birth that I can really only describe as feeling like you are drowning. Even though I loved him more than anything and I felt very grateful to be at home with him there were times I felt like I didn't want my life at all. In today's world it's so hard because there is so much pressure to be a perfect mom, nobody wants to admit that it's just hard, and sometimes it might not be what you expected. This was the challenge for me. I had to figure out this "new normal" in my life, and just the same, I now have to figure out my "new normal" with 2, and it is isn't easy.
The best thing we can do for each other as moms is just be a little easier on ourselves. Be a little easier on your friends! If they cancel on you for coffee, assume they're at home banging their head against the wall. Because they might be! Let's watch out for each other a little more. Let's give each other a few more hugs a day. Let's bring each other coffee from Starbucks when we are having a good day and share our good mood. We are all in this together!
Tuesday, January 22, 2013
Liebster Award Nomination
Oh this is so fun! A friend nominated me for the Liebster award a few months ago and I figured I really needed to respond to it because another friend had nominated me awhile before that for the Versatile Blogger Award and I didn't respond yet. As Susanah at That Organic Girl explained, the Liebster is for up and coming bloggers who don't have as many followers, as in under 200. The idea is to get more people to start reading their blog and help them get more followers. So, an easy way for me to offend more people with my lack of a filter. Awesome!
Thanks to my friend Susanah at That Organic Girl for the nomination, and thank you to my friend Mia Mauer Heckendorf at Ms. Mia Maree for the Versatile blogger award back in 2011! Both girls have hubbies in this crazy football world so it's always nice to get picked by fellow football wives too :)
Here are the rules...
11 Things About Me:
I hope you enjoy these other blogs! Stay tuned for Thursday when I explain why I thought it would be a good idea to dry up my placenta and eat the pills after baby Luke was born. Make sure to set aside time to read at lunch! Yum!
Thanks to my friend Susanah at That Organic Girl for the nomination, and thank you to my friend Mia Mauer Heckendorf at Ms. Mia Maree for the Versatile blogger award back in 2011! Both girls have hubbies in this crazy football world so it's always nice to get picked by fellow football wives too :)
Here are the rules...
- Each person tagged must post 11 things about themselves
- They must also answer the 11 questions the tagger has set for them.
- They must create 11 more questions to ask bloggers they have decided to tag
- They must then choose 11 bloggers to tag with less than 200 followers.
- These lucky bloggers must be told.
- There are no tag backs.
Alright so here we go...
11 Things About Me:
- I'm a complete sucker for animals dressed as humans.
- If I don't exercise I am a scary, scary person to be around. I'm like a hamster. Must run on the wheel for a little while every day. Or in my case, push my 2 boys in the stroller or get thee fat rear end to the YMCA.
- I have 2 boys and a wonderful husband. My husband is extremely kind and it is my mission to raise my 2 boys to be kind.
- I love to eat alone in bed. Watching Bravo. That is my happy place.
- I ran cross country and track in high school. I am not very athletic but I love to sweat and work out. I joined these sports because I really liked that they didn't cut anybody.
- I absolutely hate the dentist, and I absolutely love really well manicured parks.
- It is very rare to catch me having brushed my teeth, shaved my legs, flossed, and blow dried my hair all on the same day. I like to save them all for anniversaries and Christmas. Mostly just anniversaries.
- I don't know what I would do without my husband. He is my best friend and understands me better than anyone else in the world. My favorite thing about him is that he is very even keeled and non-judgemental.
- I am very defensive of my family. I think this comes from growing up moving around a lot.
- I do not like being pregnant but feel like God has one more baby out there for me. Good thing the hubs knows what a Push Present is.
- Hard alcohol turns me into "College Sarah." And she's kinda scary. I can drink beer like I weigh 240 lbs and my name is Chip.
Questions from my nominator Susanah:
- What is your dream job? I do love to write, so probably something where I was sitting and writing my opinion all day interspersed with playing with my 2 kids and eating chocolate. Yes this sounds like a perfect day.
- What are you going to be for Halloween? It has taken me too long to write this post, I didn't dress up and went as myself (an angry pregnant lady), and dressed my poor child up as humpdy dumpdy.
- What is one item that you could not live without? Hm....My phone is probably right up there and that's embarrassing. Either my phone or my running shoes.
- If you could have any animal as a pet, what would you choose? I am not a huge animal person but I love king charles cavalier dogs and if I had a dog would love to have this kind. For some reason I could actually see myself as that crazy older lady who owns a parrot. I don't know why.
- What is your favorite thing to eat? oooh so hard to narrow it down to one thing! I love chipolte's bowls, that is probably my favorite meal. I also love a really good burger, pizza, anything done with a white potato....and shortbread cookies.
- What is your favorite sport to play? Watch? I love to run, and I love to watch football. I am frighteningly horrible at any sport with balls but still love to play anything.
- What is your dream car? Range Rover. Black. With a very hip Justin Bieber song playing and no car seats in the back :)
- Toilet Paper roll under or over? OVER!!!
- What's the greatest city you've ever visited? This is tough. I'm not too insanely well traveled. Outside of the United States, I have been to England to visit a friend, Jamacia on my honeymoon, and Canada a few times when the hubs was playing in the Canadian Football League. I have lived a lot of different places all over the country but would love to be more well traveled outside the United States as time goes on. I am going to have to go with Cambridge, I found it to be so intensely historical and interesting. Dream trips include: Ireland and Greece.
- Was it the Chicken or the Egg? :) hmmm. The chicken? I really don't know. I love eggs. Scrambled with cheese, thanks.
- What do you think about the whole Organic Food stuff?...Feel free to be totally honest, won't offend me a bit. Ironically I just had a conversation about this yesterday with my friend Tyan because I bought a vita mixer. I'm going to try to see if making smoothies will help me to fulfill all the fruit and veggie servings I need in a day. I think that as I have more kiddos I feel a deeper obligation to feed them as healthy as possible. For me I don't actually focus as much on "organic" as just trying to feed them "good foods." Do I have animal crackers in my pantry as we speak, and do they have preservatives in them? Yes. Do I try to make sure we all get as many fruits and vegetables as possible? Yes. I think you can make yourself crazy or just try your best to eat as balanced as possible.....I tend to mix in a few nights a month where I just fall asleep with a large pizza on my lap and The Real Housewives blaring in the background. I mean a girls gotta live....
Here are my 11 questions for my nominees!!!
Readers, feel free to answer these questions as well? I think they could be great dinner conversations with the spouse this evening.
1. Would you rather be a man for a month or not have boobs anymore for 6 months?
2. If you have had to pee for 30 minutes and you have been holding it and you are dying about to pee your pants, and your only option is to pee in front of your first boyfriend or wait another 2 hours, what do you do?
3. Would you eat a small spider for $40?
4. On a typical day, what is the best part of your day, and the worst part of your day?
5. Would you allow a starting linebacker for the NFL to tackle you fair and square on a football field like you are Peyton Manning if you are allowed to eat cookies and cake the rest of your life and not gain an ounce?
6. If you answered the above question "yes," what is your favorite cookie or cake? If you answered this question "no," do you consider yourself crazy?
7. What's your favorite recipe? Please share.
8. What are 3 things you hope to have accomplished by the time you are 40?
9. If you could go anywhere in the world where would you go?
10. Would you rather sleep on a pillow made of boogers for 1 month or have a booger that is clearly hanging out of your nose and there is nothing you can do about it for 5 straight days?
11. Who are your 5 dream dinner guests?
I honestly don't have the chance to read as many blogs as I would like but here are a few
My Nominees:
My Nominees:
Kaela at Cookin' And Kickin'
I hope you enjoy these other blogs! Stay tuned for Thursday when I explain why I thought it would be a good idea to dry up my placenta and eat the pills after baby Luke was born. Make sure to set aside time to read at lunch! Yum!
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