Things I hate....The tales of a bitter pregnant lady

Before delving into a bitter biopic of everything that I hate I would first like to say that I know it's an incredible blessing to be pregnant and have a baby growing inside of me. God has granted me something amazing and I can't wait to meet this person that Zac and I already have so much love for. 

That being said, I am, without a shred of doubt in my mind, the most bitter pregnant woman on the planet. At 31 weeks pregnant, after 2 hospital visits and contractions and dilating, I am on modified bed rest and forced to basically do nothing until Baby 2 comes. Unfortunately, with nothing but time to think, there are more and more things I'm realizing I just hate overall. By November I'm just going to be spitting nails and probably won't be able to communicate like a normal human being, but it's probably just as well because I'll be waddling and swollen by then anyway.

THINGS I HATE (feelings like it's stronger with the caps?)
Dentist
Oh my gosh. There is a separate entire blog you can read about how much I hate the dentist. Here it is:
http://www.bigmamataylor.com/2012/02/wooden-teeth.html

So even though I've already taken you there, I just can't leave it off the list and let it think it's back on my good side. It has been a really, really, really long time since I have been to the dentist. Only my husband, mother and mother in law know these numbers and I'm not revealing them until I have had this baby and write a blog with some wine in me. It's pretty yucky, yet I just can't bring myself to make the appointment! 
"Oh hello, yes this is Sarah, I haven't been in pain in like 3 months, so I'm thinking I want you to prod around on my gums, stick a shot in the roof of my mouth and drill a hole in my tooth next Tuesday, do you have an opening?" 
I THINK NOT! This is America and thank goodness one of our laws is not dentistry attendance.

Lifting
I absolutely love to run and do cardio. It brings me to a happy place and I am pretty positive you wouldn't want to know me without any endorphins running through me, it's what makes me tolerable. But as much as I love a good sweat and the cardio part, I just hate to lift. I know it's so important though, and even more blaringly so as I get closer and closer to 30 years of age and I see that the boobs I used to have up by chin have decided to start heading south to my belly button. Lifting supposedly snaps everything back into place but unfortunately I guess all the pizza I'm eating is pulling it back anyway. Some of my reasons include: meaty boys who invade my area and smell like feet, weights make my hands feel yucky, I can't watch the Real Housewives like I do when I run.

Language barriers 
Living in Florida, I never thought that I would face so many language barriers as I do. I was ready and expected the senior citizens, and I was even open to the idea of shuffleboard Fridays and dinner at 3:30 p.m. But the insane amount of Cubans and Venezuelans? Ya that one caught me off guard. Everywhere I go in Weston/Ft Lauderdale people are speaking Spanish, and pretty upset that I do not speak Spanish. Like, literally, not a word. But the even bigger issue is that to fit in, I try to talk to them in my idiot English, but with a Spanish accent. It's the nerves I guess, but I'm pretty positive it comes off as, insane mom can't talk. Unfortunately this is true with all accents. If I talked to someone British for literally 10 minutes, I would probably end the conversation by telling them I was "desperate for a scone," shouting "Cheerio!" in their face and skipping off. Is this a need to please? A need to fit in? Either way it happens with everyone and every accent.

Ok now I feel like a total crab....I don't want my unborn baby to be soaking up all this bitterness. I guess I could list some things that I do love.

Icing 
What is icing made of? Little drops of heaven. That's what. I'm not sure who invented icing but let's please have a moment of internet silence for that genius. I can imagine the pre-invention conversation went like this:
Bill: Marge this cake is good but something is missing. It's not enough I'm getting fat on just cake. It's missing more sugar I guess?
Marge: Bill you're an idiot. Eat your cake.
(Bill thinks to himself, "Geesh Marge is crabby, is she pregnant?")
2 days later, Bill is in the lab, and somehow creates a little something I call, therapy on a spoon. My life is forever changed. If you haven't stood at your kitchen sink with a very large spoon, eating funfetti icing out of the container, then you really haven't lived.

Q tipping my ears
I have no idea why this is so glorious but it is. I really love to Q-tip my ears. There I said it. Now everyone knows. I feel like I revealed something private and I have no idea why. Maybe because I do it in the bathroom? Once in awhile I'll buy the off-brand of Q-tips and get home wondering what type of crack I was on, only Q-tip brand has the exact right sized cotton swab down, they really know their stuff. If I go on a trip more than 2 days and don't have Q-tips, I start to feel like my ears are closing in on my brain and I am going to explode if I don't get in there and dig around. I know this is far from the truth and I'm actually pretty sure it's not even good to Q-tip at all, so I'm not sure why this is.

Chocolate
No explanation necessary. 

Fall clothes
Huge knee high boots and scarves seem to balance out my badunkadunk. Unfortunately it is 97 degrees and 1000% humidity in Florida all.the.time. so I don't foresee a lot of fall clothes being worn here.

Storms
Makes me feel ok about spending a whole day eating cookie dough and watching Real Housewives reunions.

I'm going to try to think of some more things I like. Surely there is more.